#yes you are trying to constantly kill my cat but you’re also just a cat

[wewontbesleeping]

$630 on vet bills this time <3

[avocado-writing]

Hi dear! I would like to appreciate your works. I really enjoy everything you wrote, Wish you have a great day! 💗

Since you're taking requests, could you please write Wade with a polite, sweet and delicate partners. He's with a person who's the definition of "Too pure for this world and MUST be PROTECTED at all cost" His partner showers him with love and validation, and always love to listen to him! Thanks! 💓

possibly based on real life events.

Wade Wilson is so in love, it must be sickening to everyone around him. 

In fact he knows it is and he does not care. He’ll say “look at this meme the love of my life sent me!” and the person who he shows will roll their eyes, as if you don’t have incredible taste in cat pictures. He’ll monologue constantly about how cute you are and how much he loves that scrunchy thing you do with your nose. He’s recited committed-to-memory facts about you so many times that his friends can parrot them too. 

“Yes, I know what their favourite film is, I know you took them to a special viewing of it for their birthday. It’s cute, Wade,” says Laura, patting him on the arm condescendingly. Well, it’s not his fault you’re so wonderful! There isn’t a single thing about you that’s not perfect. He’s constantly bowled over about just how much affection he can fit in his body for you. The other night he was going on about something stupid - he can’t even remember what now, maybe it was about the new Taco Bell menu? - and then realised you hadn’t interrupted him once to shut him up like most people would.

You’d looked over the top of your magazine at him when he’d pointed this out, brow cocked.

“Why would I want you to shut up? I like listening to you talk, Wade.”

Marry you. He’s going to marry you. Every day, then divorce you every day too so he can marry you again. 

You are probably too good for him. Most of his social circle thinks so. You’re patient and kind, when you’re not at your job - where you work at a charity adopting out senior animals, as if you could be any more of a fucking angel - you like to spend your time in his shitty little kitchen, baking desserts for him to get home to. He’ll find you getting Al to taste test for you and his apartment full of laughter and joy. 

Man, he’s definitely put on like, six pounds since the two of you started dating. He needs to be stronger in the face of your cupcakes. 

They are really fucking good though. 

He walks in that night with a plushie under his arm. It’s a cow. He remembers you mentioning offhand how cute you thought cows were, so he decided to grab the biggest one the toy store one the way home had just because he knows it’ll make you smile. You don’t need any more stuffed toys; you sleep with them all in the bed and they’re pushing him off the side at this point because of their sheer number but, well, he likes seeing you happy. 

And then he hears sobbing. 

“Sweetheart?” he asks, immediately panicked. Are you injured? Has someone come to hurt you - has he painted a target on your back because of his job? Bile fills his throat as he stumbles forward…

…and there you are, sitting in front of the TV, PlayStation controller in your lap as tears run down your face while the end of the game plays out. Wade has never felt such relief in his life, laughing as the ache of it is taken from his chest. You turn to him with wide, watery eyes. 

“Don’t you laugh at me, Wade Wilson!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But babe… are you crying at the end of Kingdom Hearts?”

“No!” you lie, trying to mop your face off with your sleeve. Then the music hits its crescendo from the crappy speakers and you start wailing all over again. 

He loves you. He’d kill a million billion people for you. It would take a hell of a long time but hey, one word and he’d do it. If anyone even lifted a finger to hurt you he’d execute them so thoroughly that every generation of their family would be wiped out of existence too. 

To put it in terms you’d approve of, he’d do anything for you. But he also knows you’d never ask him to. You’re just that wonderful. 

“… would it help if I got us take-out and you started playing the second one?”

“Uh-huh,” you manage to confirm. 

“I could be in this fucking game, beat Donald Duck’s little feathery ass. Disney, make it happen.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry about it. Pizza or Chinese?”

Taglist: @falsewordz @malfoys-demigod @belilwen @mildly-salted @tvwebs @childeslegstrap @getmeoutofhell @s1eep-o @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @yrthr @momopad @sugarplumz100 @captainjinkx @madspads @acrosstheunivcrse @yeethaw13 @na-is-salty @florduarte @hunterispunk

[blueeyedgirll]

Sneaking In - Sal Fisher x F!Reader

a/n: this is something i literally think about constantly :)> sneaking out was sal’s idea not yours there’s no delinquency here. unfortunately this is NOT part two of he’d loooove that because to be transparent i don’t know where to go with it! i promise i started it though it’ll come out soon •3•

this fic includes: boyfriend sneaking in trope, rebellion, sal ITCHING to see you, no use of y/n, for some reason you don’t have a screen on your window but whatever, established relationship, smooching, cuddling

The dark, late night sprawls outside as the twinkle of fairy lights keeps you awake. The chatter from the movie you were watching keeps your ears occupied as you consider texting or calling someone to ease the boredom overtaking you.

You settle on your boyfriend, Sal.

You and Sal had been dating for almost a year and a half. You started dating in the beginning of freshman year, and are still together now, halfway through sophomore year. Dating Sal had been nothing short of wonderful. He has always been such a kind and loving person, and it shows in your relationship. You and Sal are the kind of couple that people call “goals,” or talk about because they “need a relationship like that.”

You pick up your phone to text Sal, but upon reaching his contact, you decide to call him instead.

The line rings once, twice, and then he picks up.

“Hey, love. Are you alright? Why are you calling so late?” He says as less of a question for his sake and more to make sure you were okay.

“Yeah, I just missed you,” You respond.

“Well, I miss you too. I’m glad you called.” Sal pauses for a moment and you hear shuffling.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to move Gizmo off my bed so I can lie down.”

You laugh at the thought of Sal trying his hardest to gently move his very large cat off the bed.

“Just pick him up,” You say, realizing that it’s in his nature to be gentle so he likely wouldn’t.

“No, he’s comfortable.” You hear him scoff in frustration and the thunk of him hitting the bed. “I give up.”

You laugh and change the subject.

“Well, what were you doing before you decided to evacuate Gizmo?”

“Honestly… I was trying to study for my history test, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Oh, yeah. It was really hard to try to remember what years the American Revolution took place when the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen kept crossing my mind.”

His sudden compliment made you smile.

“Why, thank you. Luckily I wasn’t doing anything productive, because I promise you I would’ve been in the same boat…” You think for a moment. You both really miss each other, so why not make plans for the weekend?

“Sal, I want to see you. Want to hang out tomorrow?”

He pauses before he answers.

“Why wait?”

“What?”

“Why wait until tomorrow? I miss you now.”

You consider his point. You missed him now, too. But the thorough punishment that awaited you if your parents found out hung over you like a storm cloud.

“Sal, my parents will kill me if I sneak out.”

“Then let me.”

“My parents will also kill me if they catch me sneaking my boyfriend in my room in the dead of night. Can’t you hear how bad that sounds?”

“That’s why they won’t catch me. Please, baby? I can be sneaky, I promise.”

You pause for a moment.

You consider.

You decide the reward outweighs the consequences.

“Okay. I’ll see you in a few then?”

You can hear him silently cheer. “Yes you will. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The phone beeps after the call ends. A rush of adrenaline and emotions flows through you as it fully processes that you’re sneaking your boyfriend in, but the risk just made it that much more fun.

A few minutes pass that consist of you switching between pacing your room and tidying up. You realize that Sal needs to get in somehow, so you turn to leave your room and unlock the back door. Before you could leave, however, you hear a tap on the window.

You throw open your curtains and it is none other than Sal. His electric blue hair illuminated by the moonlight, he stares up at you, eyes visibly crinkled through the eyeholes in his mask.

You open the window to let him in. He smiles up at you and hoists himself onto your windowsill before jumping silently onto your floor. He stops to look around for a moment, then pulls you into his arms.

“We have a door, you know,” You say teasingly.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

You smile at him and draw your hands around his neck, pulling his face closer to yours. You reach to the back of his head and unbuckle his mask, and he bows his head to let you.

You pull the mask off of his scarred face and he looks at you longingly with his bright blue lovesick eyes. Before either of you can speak, you both lean into a kiss. His lips meet yours in a unification powerful enough to make your knees tremble. He wraps a hand around your waist and pulls you deeper into the kiss, allowing you to run your hands through his soft hair.

"Wasn't this worth it? And, hey, I bet your parents are still sound asleep. They don't have a clue!" Sal drags out the last few words of his sentence in an excited whisper.

"Yeah, it was. Thank you for coming over."

"No problem. I missed you and it made me really want to see you."

"I can tell."

He smiles at your comment and moves to sit on your bed. You set his mask on your bedside table and follow his lead by propping yourself up on the headboard, patting the spot beside you to urge him over. He sits right next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. He's so close that you can feel how warm he is through his sweater and smell his body wash.

He turns his head to give you a kiss on the cheek. You wrap your arms around his waist and fit your head into the spot between his neck and his collarbone, listening to his heart steadily beating.

"I love you," Sal whispers. "I love you, too."

[ofpineapplesanddawns]

❛ they say you’re dangerous, but you’re my safe. ❜

For Peter/Martin?

(Rare moment of sincerity for these two? Or immediately ruined by a stupid joke? Up to you)

I could ruin this with a stupid joke, but I think Peter needs a moment to be... ya know, a mature adult once in a while.

Warning: mentions of death, mentions of vampires (Peter is one, but he doesn't like being called a vampire), don't google your boyfriend

On with the fic!

--

Peter would be the first to admit to anyone that asked that, yes, he often ruined things for himself.

It was a terrible habit of his, he knew that the joys in his life would easily get smeared and ruined by his own hands. Like right now, the video he was watching (the fifth one, this time being narrated by a young woman who was doing her makeup) was not helping the nasty feeling in his chest and stomach.

He had gotten curious about Martin, about wanting to know more about The Surgeon. Martin didn't really talk much about his serial killing days, he was weird and vague, despite the odd moments of pride he felt over some things during those dark days. Peter was like a cat, curious, and he was stuck inside tonight, massive storm, took out part of the power in town, and that included the hotel (thank someone he had left a portal battery charging for a vampire hunt that never happened tonight).

And what does one do when curious and bored?

You google the fuck outta shit.

He had read Martin's wiki article, and his article on the serial killer wiki (which he didn't know was a thing). He found out that there were books about Martin, usually in books about killers. He was often lumped in with the doctors of death, sometimes mislabeled as an angel of mercy. Which is not true, Martin never killed on the job, he did it during his off-duty hours because he never mixed work with pleasure.

Then Peter found the youtube videos, and here he was, in the middle of the night, watching some girl in England doing her makeup while talking about the horrific murders known as The Quartet performed by the man in his bed.

Peter paused the video, looking at Martin, who was sleeping soundly as the rain fell hard. Usually they were sleeping during the day, Peter's... condition, made it hard for him to spend too much time out in sunlight, and Martin adjusted to sleeping during the day to spend time with him. But it was a cold, rainy night, and with the power out, neither had much to do.

Peter couldn't really sleep during the night, so while Martin slept, he was making things difficult for himself in this relationship by thinking too hard.

Martin was a dangerous, horrible man. He had blood on his hands, twenty-three people died at his hands. Yes, one of them was a very dangerous serial killer, but what of the others? How many of them had done horrible things? From all the videos Peter had watched, the victims were all deemed as good people, minus the last one.

But Martin was a good person too, right? He cared so deeply about his family, constantly worrying about them and keeping updated as often as he could. And he cared about Peter, he really liked Peter, and promised to keep him safe, even if Peter was technically the more powerful out of the two of them.

He set his phone aside and laid down, facing Martin. This man was a doctor, he spent years helping so many people. He saved lives, he tries his best to save those who had just stepped over the line of death.

But he also took lives, and from how Peter had seen him kill a vampire not too long ago, it seemed to give Martin a thrill. He had never seen someone so excited to watch the life (unlife?) drain from someone's eyes as he squeezed his hands around their throat. Then again, the vampire had tried to kill Peter, so maybe he was... happy that he saved Peter's life?

"Why am I trying to justify this...?" Peter mumbled to himself. He looked at Martin still, the man was still sound asleep, and looked so content.

He hadn't killed a single human since his escape, at least, his second escape. The one that led him here, where he found Peter. Yeah, he did try to dissect Peter, but he really thought Peter was dead when he had tried.

God, this was weird.

Peter's life was a fucking mess.

And yet he still liked Martin. Probably loved him, but he wasn't sure if he could say that yet.

He sighed softly, hearing the rain come down harder, and he hoped that Martin was too deep in sleep to hear him.

"They say you’re dangerous, but you’re my safe... place." He mumbled, low enough that even he barely heard himself. He shifted closer and felt himself quickly change shape.

Hard to have complicated thoughts when you were a bat. All he wanted to do was snuggle up against Martin's face and sleep, so that's what he did.

--

Gotta be awkward as fuck to be watching true crime videos about your killer boyfriend while he's right there.

[the-cannibal]

Could I please get a matchup, thank you for the opportunity!

I go by the name of Nex, I'm 5'8 tall, an Istp, Capricorn, ADHD filled with severe social anxiety. I have really short brown hair, brown eyes and I'm mixed.

I absolutely love drawing and making up Ocs (Original characters). I also have a huge obsession with Pokémon, I collect Pokémon plushies, clothes, books, cards and literally anything you can imagine. Cats are my absolute favourite animal and I own 3 that mean the world to me!

I'm kinda childish and I have the habit of constantly daydreaming or dozing off if I'm bored or sometimes completely randomly. I'm often called really lazy but I just struggle to find motivation for most things. I'm usually Very calm but if someone pushes me around too much I will physically fight them without no warning.

I bite when showing affection (only if the person doesn't mind) I'm not used to getting compliments so if someone compliments me I'll be extremely shy and flustered but deny it.

And again thank you for the opportunity! I hope you have a great day

Oh my gosh is your picture gengar because if yes I love that! I wrote this on my phone so I’m sorry if it gets laid out weird

I paired you with…

Jason Vorhees!

This sweet man I think would be perfect for you! You’re childish? (Honestly same-) so is he! You can bet money that you would find him snuggled up on the couch with one… okay more like most, of your plushies wrapped in his arms.

He doesn’t quite understand what Pokémon is exactly, but he recognizes it! So do not be surprised if you wake up to some new books, shirts, plushie, cards, just laying on the table for you to find. I can neither confirm nor deny that the last owner of these items are alive.

I think his favorite Pokémon would be cubchoo so if you have a plush of them, respectfully that is now Jason’s. Sorry I don’t make the rules. Besides how could you say no to that cute face of his 🥺

Jason would try to braid your hair. You know it’s too short for that but he still tries! He is very determined! It’s quite adorable.

I totally see Jason as a cat dad. You guys laying in bed, snuggling with your cats as you contemplate getting up to start the coffee pot or tea kettle. Jason isn’t lazy, he has things to do around the camp to make sure no one trespasses, but he has offically made saturdays “Nex and Jason” day! You guys hang out inside the cabin, snuggling, watching movies, making art… just enjoying each others presence!

If he catches you day dreaming he will probably snap you out of it to make sure you are okay, he is a big mother hen and worries at the slightest things.

The first time you bit him he was a bit shocked? It didn’t hurt him at all (my guy has literally been stabbed, shot, killed and brought back from the dead. He can handle a lot-) but he had never seen someone give affection that way… no no no! Don’t stop! It’s cute! Just make sure you are biting him when he doesn’t have blood covering him.

He is very shy as well, so both of you are blushing messes when it comes to complimenting each other.

Oh look Jason! Another calm person just for you! Isn’t that so nice- oH MY GOD ARE THEY IN A FIST FIGHT-?!

Yeah he definitely holds you back in his arms as you flail around like a rabid raccoon.

[shugar0cone]

This is an OC intro/fan fiction

Please note that I have never posted somthing like this on here, so a lot of these controls/buttons are kinda unknown for me. Also you can tell where my hands started to cramp BC I’m on phone but I Perfur computer over this.

Warnings: (Oc x cannon) (mention of death) (mention of a miscarried) (mentions of death, gore, cannibalisim) ( mentioned of sexism)

-story below cut-

I remeber it like it was yesterday and not well god damn how old am I? I had to question myself on this a lot I’ve been down here for the longest of time, it felt like I was forgetting life and only remembering death. Well the year was 1910, I was 10 at the time. Ya see we had a land up in New Orleans it’s been passed down from gen to gen, me being a woman (and the time period it was in) I couldn’t inherit this land. My father Henry Trix and his wife (my mom) Mary trix tried to have a boy but nearly every time my mom had a miscarriage, or the child died on birth. When anything like this happened mom and dad got sad for a few days. My dad used to Pat my head telling me “it’s al’ight hun it ain’t yo’ fault.” His acscent was strong. My mother who is a French women hid her accent well. One day I brought home a coon skull fully intact, my dad was horrified but my mom said “c'est parfait!” And made some butifull art with em, you could tell she was happy when the French came out in her. One day it all went down hill my mom caught pneumonia and back then there was no coming out of it. My dad and I sat by her in her final days. As days rose I became more responsible for our land, I hunted, fed our chickens, horses and mule. I was quite the shot dad used to tell me. I could hit a bullseye a mile away!

When summer ended that year I went back to school I was quite intelligent the only thing I could not get down was the sewing classes. I used to prick my finger all the time and for being a straight shot I had some shaky hands when it came to that. One day while out on lunch I sat on the grass trying to sew. I’m assuming somone saw me struggling. That’s when I met this boy he was quite interesting he was smart and charismatic I’m supprised I never talked to him. He asked me if I needed help, I’m which I said “how could you do it, you’re just a boy?” My dad always got frustrated with the needle saying “MEN SHOULD NOT SEW!” We ended up going to a tailor that day. “Oh well my mother showed me how.” He sat by me takeing the needle and cloth out of my hand. “You don’t need to be forceful about it glide your way through take your time.” Id watch his hands it was effortless for him. “My you must be one good shot if your hands are that steady.” I say. “Yes I killed a buck with my dad last week!” I sat and listened to him till lunch ended. I later learned that his name was Alastor, I have heard of him all teachers expressed how courteous he was and how smart. Needless to say we’ve been friends ever since that day.

1920, I was a 20 year only single woman I worked all days to keep our land afloat, had to sell our horses and our chicken was killed by hawks but hey I still have my mule who was now probably 14. My dad passed away from the flu when I was 18, urging me to get a husband but I did not listen. I constantly received threats from the bank and/or cults saying “if you are not married within 30 days your land will be confiscated, no woman should work like this and is not responsible enough for this. “ I ignored. Al and I had a tight bond everyday after his job he’ll come to my home and be with me saying. “A lady should not be out here alone who knows what’s lerking.” Yeah we had the occasional bear and wild cat but honestly nothing a warning shot can’t fix. “Al I know it’s just, I don’t wanna marry but I do? I don’t know it’s complicated.” I say sitting down the tea that I made.

1921: Alastor and I began a relationship, like a lover kind of relationship. I don’t know how this manifested but one day he brought me flowers and asked me out, I loved Al for awhile but never expressed it really, I always thought it was a friendly feeling. I was wrong. We’d go on small dates and sometimes I would just hang out in alastors studio looking through skripts and hearing his voice. He never had days off really. He had is own apartment which ya think a celeb like him would have somthing bigger but nope. We’d read together and he’ll rant about the human mind and how just a simple smile can intimidate somone under some circumstances. Hell I never knew how much inlove with him I was.

1922: I’ve been begging Alastor to come live with me. I never realized how dark it was out there not how creppy it’s gotten especially since that Louisiana killer. He obliged but only at 1 deal, if I marry him never leave Him. The leave him part was kinda creepy he said it oddly but I said yes and made him move in as quickly as possible. Alastor was happy to have none public hunting grounds his words where “meat just taste better.” Which I agree the meat he’s been bringing home off of the couple bucks he got have been good abit chewed but good. I never understood how Alastor found good bucks that don’t taste as gamey but hey who am I to judge.

Jan 1923: sooo figured out the meat I was eating was human, and my husband is the killer but I love him. I helped him in his kills he refused for me to help get the meat off the bones saying “my, what about your dress we don’t need red on it.” I’m pretty sure it’s because my job is more messy than his. We only killed bad people though not innocents! Jhon hulkey used to beat his wife and cheat on her. I lured him out to the bar for Alastor to stick a knife in his throat, I shot maybe 1 or 12 folks but honestly I can’t remeber.

1933: stock market crashed so did my husband, one night as we where barrying a body: to fatty to eat. I was in the hole makeing sure it was deep enough so hounds or wild cats won’t sniff them up. I heard a hun being shot I thought it was Alastor but I was wrong. His thoughts and blood was on my face I did not know what to do except to get in our car and get to the hospital or police station

1934: a year has passed since my husbands death, I still killed only because I wanted his image to be good. I caught the eyes of a cult who killed widowed or unmarried woman, I guess being a celebrity’s wife makes a big target on your back. Anyways I was kidnapped from my own home drugged pretty much to only end up in a cage with men surrounding me in a fox mask and on horses. I was coverd in a white robe I was scared in that moment. When the cage was opened I went into the hill tops holding to live, maybe if I wasn’t barefoot it wouldn’t hurt as bad. These men I knew what these where when the horn blu. They where the fox hunters captured foxes and killed them for fun. I had gotten away for an hour until I heard a hind it latched onto my leg. A tall men on his devilish horse pointed his riffle at me then…

It went red.

A/N: WELL HOPED YA LIKE THIS! Sorry I usually write this on google docs so a lot of grammar mistakes and I did this on phone, I’m sorry if it’s corney and I know Al is OOC with the marriage shit but why not ya know. Honestly she is only in hell because of him but does she love him… yep death dose not due them part. Anyways bye bye!!



[lunapaper]

Album Review: 'Midnights' - Taylor Swift

What keeps Taylor Swift up at night? 

A lot, apparently: Past lovers. Romantic nostalgia. Old enemies. Made-up scenarios where her future daughter-in-law kills her for her fortune. 

Or as Taylor herself puts it: ‘[A] momentary glimmer of distraction. The tiniest notion of reminiscent thought that wanders off into wondering, the spark that lights a tinderbox of fixation. And now, it is irreversible. The flame has caught. You’re wide awake.’ 

Shrugging off her cardigan, Swift teams up once again with Jack Antonoff to turn her late night ruminations into yet another surprise release entitled Midnights. 

It’s easy to think of her latest body of work as Taylor’s own Melodrama: indebted to slick electro-pop with a taste for vengeance while riddled with self-loathing and insecurity. But, as the title might suggest, it’s a lot more low-key than Lorde’s critically-acclaimed 2017 album, made up of languorous loops of sound and the singer’s dense storytelling. You can also detect hints of Reputation and its bitter edge. 

Taylor makes a few stark confessions throughout the record. ‘I have this thing where I get older/But just never wiser,’ she admits on ‘Anti-Hero. ‘Midnights become my afternoons.’ And yes, this is the ‘sexy baby’ song. I get the point: She’s starting to feel like she’s being surpassed by younger, more provocative artists. It’s a 30 Rock reference, relax. 

Taylor also says ‘so long’ to that goody two shoes ‘Daisy May’ on ‘You’re on Your Own, Kid.’ which was probably followed by the singer setting fire to her cutesy folklore cardigan (retailing at $75 at the time) in some ritualistic bonfire. 

Insecurities regarding body image also bubble to the fore as Taylor searches a glitzy industry party filled with ‘better bodies,’ while realising that her dreams of stardom aren’t all that rare. The twee ‘Sweet Nothing’ features one of Taylor’s better verses (‘Industry disruptors and soul deconstructors/And smooth-talking hucksters out glad-handing each other/And the voices that implore, "You should be doing more"/To you, I can admit that I’m just too soft for all of it’).  

But just as she begins to show a glimmer of self-awareness, Taylor ends up doubling down hard, every well-spun bit of wordplay surrounded by a sea of clunky, often childish lines. But she knows that they’re bad and she knows everyone’s gonna talk about them, so Taylor wins again. 

Metaphors feel forced (‘Don't put me in the basement/When I want the penthouse of your heart’), while the cliches are out of control. ‘Question...?’ suffers from a serious case of Main Character Syndrome, the whole room cheering Taylor on as she makes out with the most popular boy in school. It’s a scene straight out of a Netflix original, able to envision the crane shot swirling above the two as they tenderly suck face. 

Taylor also swears yet revenge yet again on ‘Vigilante Shit,’ this time with a cat’s eye ‘sharp enough to kill a man.’ She talks as if karma is her own personal pet she can just sic on her enemies at will, which is especially galling as someone who’s cultivated such a rabid fanbase, constantly weaponising them against those who supposedly cross her. Not that long ago, they went after a grown man and his sister over a red scarf that DIDN’T ACTUALLY EXIST.  

Although it sounds like Taylor’s planning to kill Scooter at some point, presumably on a weekend. Remember when she revealed on ‘this is me trying’ that he had a couple of side chicks?  

Even ‘Anti-Hero’ has some pretty flawed logic: You can’t complain that you’re treated like said anti-hero one minute, then act petty and vengeful the next. It’s been almost 15 years – which one are you at this point? 

Naturally, Midnights also comes with its own labyrinth of easter eggs. No, I won’t be going through them all, ‘cos I really don’t give a fuck. I shouldn’t need a guidebook to tell me which song is about John Mayer and which one contains the Knives Out reference. If anything, the album only further proves that Taylor doesn’t need to commit every single thought to tape. Sometimes, it really, really isn’t that deep. 

Final track ‘Mastermind’ offers the most telling glimpse into Taylor’s psyche - ‘No one wanted to play with me as a little kid/So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since/To make them love me and make it seem effortless.’ She even calls herself ‘Machiavellian’ at one point. Whether it’s in jest is kinda hard to tell, but it’s certainly a... choice. 

Musically, Midnights is also a pretty mixed bag. ‘Vigilante Shit’ is a highlight, with bass throbbing its way around dark corners in a way that’s rather Billie-esque, which just makes the ‘sexy baby’ line from ‘Anti-Hero’ feel even more glaring. ‘Lavender Haze’ also utilises those subterranean bass groans, creating a murky, seductive groove beneath metallic gears shifts. ‘You’re On Your Own, Kid,’ meanwhile,’ is a more grown-up ‘Love Story’ from the point of view of a more jaded Juliet. ‘Anti-Hero,’ though, is just a lazy rehash of ‘Blank Space,’ right down to the complaints of feeling misunderstood. 

‘Karma’ is a more stylish and euphoric take on Washed Out’s ��Feel It All Around.’ ‘Snow on the Beach’ also twinkles; delicate and windswept. But for all of Swift’s excitement to be collaborating with Lana Del Rey, the singer is relegated to backing vocalist. ‘Cos, let’s face it, Taylor would never let herself be upstaged like that. 

And yes, there’s a 3am edition of Midnights, ‘cos Taylor’s gonna milk those late night ruminations for all they’re worth, dammit.  

‘The Great War’ is okay, but not that great. Honour, truth, treaties, poppies, calling off the troops, we get it. ‘Bigger Than the Whole Sky’ has a hypnotic country twang, returning to the lush, cloudy nostalgia of folklore and evermore. ‘Would’ve Could’ve, Should’ve’ is a stormy, Fleetwood Mac-esque riposte at Mayer (found it), reflecting on the power imbalance in their romance while pleading: ‘Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first.’ 

Midnights is a well-produced but rather unnecessary record. Even with its slick, shimmery wash, it’s everything you’ve heard before in some form or another: A song about John, a song about Tom, a song about Calvin. ‘Yes, I know I can be quite a divisive character, but I’m really just like you!’ Revenge. A couple of love songs dedicated to Joe. Probably something about Kanye and Kim. More revenge. Oh, and here’s a dossier full of clues for you to connect together like Charlie Kelly trying to track down the elusive Pepe Silvia. Boom, critical acclaim!  

As cynical as I felt about folklore and evermore, at least those records possessed some growth and a few interesting ideas. But as those albums were to indie folk, Midnights feels late to the party when it comes to brooding noir pop, the kind that’s already been perfected by other artists in every way imaginable. It’s really just a CHVRCHES or Purity Ring record in a quirky jumper.  

But what do I know? The record’s already gone to No.1. Buying presale tickets for her US tour turned into a bloodbath. Taylor could release a full hour of silence, and stans will hail it as an artistic statement and critics will write one in-depth analysis after another. And Stereogum will probably write the most positive negative review of it ever. Taylor’s no longer capturing the zeitgeist at this point, she is the goddamn zeitgeist.  

- Bianca B. 

[randoimago]

It's 🦖 anon! It's been kinda long since my last request. Mind if I request Angie, Mikan, Celestia and Asahina with SHSL escape artist S/O? P.S. You forgot to add my SHSL paleontologist S/O request in masterlist.

S/O Being the Ultimate Escape Artist

Fandom: Danganronpa

Characters: Angie, Mikan, Celeste, Asahina

Type of Request: Headcanons

Notes: Hopefully by the time this comes out I've added that ask to the Masterlists 😅

Angie

Wonders if you will join Himiko in doing a magic show. Also wonders if someone else will die if you did do that. Hopefully not you.

Would like to test out what exactly you can escape from. 

Would find tinier and tinier containers to see if you can get out of them. Might start treating you like a cat honestly.

Wonders if your talent could help you escape this killing game and if you’re able to get others to escape with you. It’d be risky but you might as well try it.

Asahina

She gets so excited when it comes to watching you escape from being tied up or having handcuffs that were previously on you now unlocked.

Absolutely wants to know how you manage to do it.

Yes it’s your Ultimate Talent, but there’s got to be some tricks, right? She wants to know them.

Is glad for your talent because you’ve probably helped get her out of a few predicaments from her absentmindedness.

Celeste

She does find it intriguing. Would tie you up or put handcuffs on you just to see how easily you’re able to get out of it. 

Celeste is the Ultimate Gambler so she might make a bet with you about how long it takes for you to escape something. Put both of your talents to the test.

Might make comments about putting you in a swimming pool tied to an anchor just to see if the added danger does anything to your talent.

There’s just so many aspects to your talent and she wants to know them all.

Mikan

Constantly making sure you’re alright. Yes you can escape from handcuffs and ropes and such but can you do it unharmed? 

Seriously will be looking you all over to make sure you don’t have rope burns or blisters from things being too tight.

Mikan is happy to watch if you do any magic shows or such with your talents, but she can’t help but worry. What if something goes wrong? She can’t lose you. 

Honestly could use some tips from you. She’s constantly getting tied up from weird, random things so please help her.

[sweaterweather-247]

Dating Henry Creel Headcanons

STRANGER THINGS SPOILERS

You met Henry at Hawkins lab when Brenner hired you to watch the children.

He loved how caring you were with the children and how you weren’t like other humans.

He would always be by your side and would protect you if one of the kids got mad.

He asked you out after he disabled the cameras.

You said yes and started a secret relationship with him.

Henry told you that this place is a prison and you two needed to escape together.

You wanted the kids to come with you but he told you that they would escape on their own.

Henry would come in your room and make out with you.

It was hard to have a relationship with the cameras everywhere.

When you’re watching the kids he’s always close to you and trying to touch you in a friendly way.

You want to escape with him.

He told you he was a number and he thought you would run but you didn’t.

You stole some stuff from the infirmary to get that tracker out.

You cut the tracker from his neck and immediately run and get to a hospital.

Henry saw what you were willing to do for him and wanting to be the best boyfriend he could be.

You two skipped town and started a new life since Henry was considered dead.

He spent since age 12 at Hawkins lab and like Eleven, he didn’t know much about modern life outside of the lab.

You went shopping together to get him some new clothes.

You taught him how to cook and clean and how to buy groceries.

You got a job and Henry stayed at home until you could get him a new identity.

He cooked dinner for the both of you and cleaned the house for you both.

He would always ask if he was doing ok and if he was doing it right.

You always reassured him that he was doing good.

You two would play chess together and other games.

You got a new identity for him: Henry Ballard.

He had an ID and he was going to take driving lessons.

After Henry got his ID, you introduced him to alcohol, and he liked it.

You two had to make some friends in this new town because it’s important to make friends.

You also didn’t want to be Henry’s only friend.

He’s socialized with children his whole life and needed to learn how to talk to adults (me irl)

You showed him sports games and told him jokes to loosen him up a bit.

He got along great with some of your friends and their husbands/boyfriends.

He constantly holds your hand in public and kisses you on the cheek.

PDA is a big thing with this guy, he was tired of keeping your relationship a secret in the lab and he wanted to show the world that he is yours.

Henry loves kissing you and you introduced him to making out and he loved it.

He loves being able to kiss you with tongue.

Henry will use his powers to pick you up and bring you towards him just so you can kiss him.

He uses his powers a lot, but you make sure he doesn’t do it in public and if he’s at home he does it with the curtains closed.

Henry draws you all the time, he draws you and him and he’s very good at it.

Sometimes he draws the rainbow room and the kids.

Henry gets a job as an art teacher at a local library, he loves being able to teach people about art.

If there’s a spider in the house, Henry doesn’t want you to kill it, he will relocate it for you.

You and Henry both want a cat or dog, he’s worried he might kill it if he gets angry at it, you reassure him that he would never kill something so innocent (though he can and has.)

You decide to start off small, you two babysit animals, volunteer at an animal shelter, do research about taking care of animals.

Henry doesn’t want kids because he’s worried that they will get powers as well.

Henry misses the kids in the lab, but he knew if he stayed, he couldn’t have the open and public relationship you two have now.

Your nicknames for him are: the number 1 boyfriend, love, honey.

His nicknames for you are: my darling, honey, the best thing that ever happened to me.

Henry takes a while to say I love you but after he does, he never stops saying it.

Cuddles are simply the best with Henry.

Henry the big spoon most of the time and sometimes the small spoon.

He holds you so tightly because he’s scared of losing you.

Henry can and will use his powers to hold you in place if you try squirming away.

He’s the small spoon if he has a nightmare about the lab.

Henry is very protective of you.

He’s scared of Brenner finding you and taking you away.

Henry is easily jealous, he wants you all to him.

If a guy is making you uncomfortable, he will come over to him and either tell him to leave or glare at him.

He might use his powers to make him trip or spill his glass.

In extreme cases, he will break the guys arm by making him fall.

You both go home after that.

Henry can’t tell when someone’s flirting with him, so you will need to intervene.

He likes it when you protect him, he would never cheat on you.

Sometimes you both will get into arguments.

It can be about him coming home late or him using his powers in public or if he’s jealous and thinks you’re gonna leave him.

You two always make up though, Henry can’t live without you.

Henry is the best boyfriend ever, even though he doesn’t know everything, you’re always happy to help him.

He loves you because you saved him and showed him love.

(NSFW sorry if it sucks)

Like most things, Henry doesn’t know what sex is, he might have caught two workers at the lab doing it but he doesn’t know how.

You get some porno magazines and rent a few dirty movies a town over so he understands what it is.

You’re patient with him because he’s new at this.

After a while, he wants to try and you’re more than happy to help him.

You two make a safe word and you show him how to use a condom.

If he wants to be on top, he will go really slowly and constantly ask if he’s doing it right or not.

You help him and guide him and tell him he’s doing great and it’s ok if he finishes quickly.

He kisses you a lot and smiles so much.

He does finish quick because he’s so new but you don’t blame him for it.

If he wants you to be on top, you’ll guide him and tell him he’s amazing.

After some time he starts to get good at sex.

Henry wants to be on top and will go as fast or as slow as you want.

He will kiss you and tell you that he loves you and would die for you.

You praise him and tell him he’s doing great.

You love how far he’s come and how far he can come.

Aftercare is the best with him.

He holds you close and sleepily tells you that you saved him and he’s never gonna let you go.

Henry loves you so much.

[mrs-dr-reid]

My Personal Matt Murdock Headcanons

Part 1/?

(And yes. I have discussed a handful of these with my beloved moot @leossmoonn before)

Due to his enhanced senses, he knows the perfect time to flip a pancake, never burns anything, always makes the most perfect toast, and he always kills flies on the first try

As much as he pretends to hate it because it’s kinda blasphemous, one of his favorite songs is Take Me To Church by Hozier. He also really likes Devil’s Advocate by The Neighborhood and (don’t tell anybody) Paper Rings by Taylor Swift

He’s really good with kids. Like, unnaturally good. Like, you’ll walk into a room and see him regaling your nephews with stories of Battlin’ Jack Murdock, or all of your nieces doing their best to put his hair in ponytails or “forcing” him to sing Disney songs with them (and melting when he actually gets really into it)

The most chivalrous little shit on earth. Always opening doors for you, pulling your chair out for you when you go out to eat, helping you out of taxis, kissing the back of your hand, shit like that. Simply because he loves hearing the heat rush to your cheeks

He’s annoyingly good at hide and seek, at least from a seeking standpoint because of his super weirdness. He can’t hide worth a damn, because he’s almost six feet tall and not that flexible, so he ends up trying to hide behind the big plant in your living room and you can just barely see the tiniest bit of his fluffy hair peeking out over the top of it

He’s a complete pansy when it comes to spicy food or strong flavors. The only spicy things he can kind of handle are Hot Cheetos or Takis, and even after those he has to chug like half a gallon of milk

He’s surprisingly good with animals. Like, say you’re at a petting zoo for a younger relative’s birthday party. You’ll end up finding him in some obscure corner of the animal pen with a baby goat fast asleep in his arms. Or if you’re at a family member’s house for a holiday and they happen to have a dog or a cat, you can bet the second he sits down that animal is going to make themselves at home on his lap or around his shoulders. It’s even funnier if the dog that picks him as their dog bed is huge, like you just walk into the living room to find him being borderline smothered by a very self-satisfied fully grown Great Pyrenees

His favorite times of year are the beginning of spring when all the flowers and trees are blooming, and the holidays because of all the yummy baked treats you’re constantly making that make the whole apartment smell like a real deal bakery

He can’t bring himself to go within 50 feet of a Bath and Bodywork’s or a Yankee Candle because of all the competing robust aromas, so he’ll just tell you what candle or bath product he’d like, because he physically can’t go near either of those stores without getting a wicked headache

After a particularly rough night out on patrol, you’ll most likely find him on the couch cocooned inside a weighted blanket with his expensive noise cancelling headphones over his ears, because sometimes the only way he can get calm enough to meditate is if he can’t hear anything and he doesn’t have any outside stimulation

He loves audio books, especially the ones where the narrator uses different voices to distinguish what character is speaking. Knowing this, you buy him the Harry Potter audiobooks, and it’s safe to say they quickly become his favorite because Stephen Fry is the MVP of character voices

Because his senses are so refined, you, Foggy, and Karen come up with a game where you give him five of the same thing but from different places or brands (like four black coffees from four different coffee joints and one homemade or five pints of vanilla ice cream from five different brands) to see if he can tell the difference between them. Annoyingly enough, he can, and it pisses you guys off to no end

He memorizes the heartbeats and walking patterns of the people he cares about (aka you, Foggy, and Karen), so he can pick you guys out of a crowd of thousands and instantly tell when there’s something wrong be it your heart rate is slightly irregular, your walking pace is accelerated, or god forbid you have a slight limp

Much like Anakin Skywalker, he can’t really handle the texture of sand (of course you quote that one scene whenever he mentions it just to mess with him), so he’s not the biggest fan of the beach. Then one year for a vacation you take him to your relative’s condo in Coquina Beach, Florida, and the second he feels how soft the sand is, he changes his mind about beaches, and you two decide to try and find the beach with the softest sand in the world

He loves it when you wear his clothes, especially his old Columbia sweatshirts or tees. Once when he came home, you were wearing one of his white work button ups and no pants, and he just about lost his remaining five marbles

He unironically loves VeggieTales, especially the Silly Songs with Larry. You’ve caught him humming “Oh Where is My Hairbrush?” to himself while he’s getting ready for work too many times for it to be a coincidence

He has a really good singing voice, but he only ever busts it out at a karaoke bar after a few too many whiskeys, and yet he still sounds coherent when you drunkenly usher him onto the stage. Once he sang “Hold Me While You Wait” by Lewis Capaldi, and the entire female population within the bar (and a couple of dudes, tbh) basically melted into the floor, because he has no business having the voice of an angel when he’s drunk off his ass

He likes going to museums with you that specialize in your niche interests just to hear you infodump to him about the stuff you already know and the new stuff you learn while you’re there, because he loves listening to your voice in any context

[helliontherapscallion]

sibling hybrid!creeper reader headcannons/one-shot for SBI ( + ranboo? 🧍‍♀️ ) hurt/comfort. like maybe the reader struggles with emotions and doesn't know how to deal w/ them healthily, so they end up bottling them up and kinda explode at times.

sorry if this is too specific, i just really like your writing :) congrats on 1k!! <3

and one last thing,.. can i be 🫂 anon?

(A/N): I had a lot of fun with this one, and thank you : ) I hope you don’t mind that I added Tubbo. Also one more thing, I imagine the explosion is kinda like a Bakugou situation but uncontrollable

Warnings: anti-hybrid rhetoric/slurs (speciesism???), swearing, blood (not much, just mentions of a nose bleed)

It was completely an accident this time, it all just came so fast. You were standing in front of a store window when you felt something rub against your leg. When you looked down, panic engulfed your entire being when you saw an orange cat rubbing and nuzzling against your leg, letting out deep purrs. You had no clue why this cat wasn’t chasing you like all other cats usually did, but you didn’t want to ponder. You felt the familiar pressure building up inside of you as a startled hiss left your mouth and you jumped away from the creature. Your skin was sparking and popping as your freckles lit up in a glowing green light. 

Finally, explosions left your skin as the glass shattered next to you and gravel was turned up and thrown about. You fell to your knees and rubbed at your burning eyes and wiped the blood from your nose. Exploding like that had always taken a lot out of you and made your nose bleed. You suspected that it was because of the sudden build up and release of pressure and energy. 

The back of your shirt was grabbed and you were yanked off from the ground. There staring at you was the owner of the shop that you accidentally blew up. His green eyes were ablaze as he gritted his teeth and looked into your eyes.

“Do you have any idea what you just did?! You blew up my window!”

Small hisses left your mouth, “I-I’m sorry sir I swear I didn’t mean t-”

“Like hell you didn’t! Your kind always destroys everything!”

You stopped struggling and narrowed your eyes at him, “my kind?”

“Yes, hybrids! Filthy mutts, all you do is destroy! You’re a bunch of freaks.”

You could feel another explosion coming about and this time you did not even attempt to hold this one back. You stared him dead in the eyes with the harshest glare you could muster. As soon as the hisses started to leave your mouth and the freckles once again glowed green, the man’s eyes widened before he threw you into the street away from the building. Another explosion left you and disassembled the neat cobblestone of the road. A single stone flew and shattered what was left of the store window. Another flew and hit the store owner in the head knocking him out. 

And here you were now; hisses left your mouth as you ran down the beaten path of the village towards the exit. The iron golem following you was hot on your tail, it’s booming footsteps picking up dust clouds from the gravel. Villagers around you scattered and started to whisper fearfully amongst themselves. You could feel their fearful and angry stares burning holes through you. After you got out of the village and the iron golem was still chasing you, you ducked into the forest where you knew it wouldn’t follow you. You climbed up a tree and watched as the golem angrily smacked the foliage out of the way before it gave up and hobbled back into the village. 

You dragged your feet tiredly back home, wanting nothing more than to collapse in your bed. Your senses were on overdrive as you were hyper aware of everything around you. You’ve never exploded twice within the span of ten minutes before, and it wore you out. Small exhausted hisses left your mouth as you trudged along the path. 

After getting home you walked past a confused and concerned Wilbur, dodging his hands that were trying to grab you so he could get a better look at you. You walked up the stairs ignoring his questions and walked past Tommy.

“Hey sparky, what’s got you lookin like shit?” He asked you before he started to laugh to himself at the nickname he knew you hated. You winced at the volume of his voice before you hissed angrily and stomped off into your room before you passed out immediately in your bed the second you threw yourself onto it. 

You didn’t wake up until a hand shook you awake firmly. You peeled open your eyes to see Tommy hovering over you looking slightly scared. When you fully opened your eyes, he sighed in relief.

“Oh my fucking Ender, I thought you died for a second.”

You only groaned and covered your head with the covers trying to block out the morning light streaming into your room and Tommy’s voice. He shook you more, your entire bed shaking with it. “Get up. Dad wants you downstairs for breakfast cuz you skipped lunch and dinner.”

You said nothing as he ripped the covers off from you eventually and pulled you out of your bed. You landed on the floor with a thump and hissed a little in frustration. You stood up and pushed him out of your room and slammed the door behind him. The locked door handle jimmied before it stopped and everything was silent. You prayed that he went away, but alas he didn’t. You rubbed your forehead when he started to knock at your door in multiples of two.

Knock knock, “(y/n)?” Knock knock, “(y/n)?” Knock knock, “(y/n)?” Knock kno-

“I’ll be down in a minute fuckface. I’m gonna get dressed.”

“If you aren’t down in five minutes I’m getting Techno. He’ll carry your ass down.”

Downstairs, you shambled into the kitchen past the table and poured yourself a cup of coffee. Your family silently watched you before the conversation started back up again. You plopped down next to Wilbur and sipped at your coffee deliriously. He eyed you in concern, “you okay?” You hummed and poked at your eggs. You didn’t feel hungry at all. “You su-”

“Yes, I’m sure Wilbur.” You glanced at him from the corner of your eye and returned to your coffee. After your fourth cup of coffee you were cut off by a concerned Philza. Even after four cups of coffee, you still felt slightly physically drained and it showed in your sluggish movements. Your day went by with you holding in your frustration and anger from everybody constantly asking if you were okay. Days of holding in explosions passed with them finally leaving you alone. However, that did nothing to alleviate your bottled up frustrations.

Techno was sitting on the couch reading a book while Wilbur was sitting in the chair across the room trying to find the lyrics of his next song. Philza was in the kitchen doing who knows what. You were currently walking up to Tommy’s room to say hi to your old friends Tubbo and Ranboo after getting home from a trip to another village. 

That trip was rough for you but not as rough as the one a few days prior; you could only stand so much fear filled and hateful staring after all. Your creeper features consisting of pitch black irises and dark gray sclera, a mop of dark green hair, and green freckles sprayed randomly across your skin was definitely an attention grabber for anyone. A few of the kids even threw rotten tomatoes and stones at you, it was so hard holding in explosions by the time you left that you just felt very overwhelmed. Hanging out around the self proclaimed ‘bench trio’ always enough to calm you down from a rough day. Mellohi’s muffled relaxed beat makes the corners of your lips twitch into a small smile. 

However just as you opened the door to Tommy’s room, you could hear their conversation end. “Hey guys, how’re-”

A yelp left your throat as something very cold drenched your body. An iron bucket came tumbling down and hit your head before falling to the floor with a clank. The pressure that has been building up in your chest increased tenfold, but you closed your eyes, took a deep breath, and turned to walk to your room for a change of clothes. Behind you, you heard Tommy laughing hysterically while Tubbo tried to apologize between his own laughter. You didn’t even have to look at Ranboo to know that he was guiltily fiddling with his sleeves as his tail flicked back and forth sharply. 

After you went into your room, you grabbed your pillow and screamed as loud as you could into it to blow off some steam. After that didn’t work, you tried punching the pillow relentlessly but that didn’t work. You could still feel pressure and energy inside your chest lingering and threatening to burst. 

You sighed and made your way downstairs walking past Tommy’s door. You could now hear Ranboo laughing with them, and that just made you even more angry than you were before. 

Everything around you was pissing you off. Philza’s wings fluttering behind him subconsciously, Technoblade’s little ‘heh’’s as he read something that caught him off guard in his book, Wilbur’s humming and mumbling to himself as he composed his next song, Tommy’s, Ranboo’s, and Tubbo’s loud laughter echoing from Tommy’s room. Every little sound was enough to send you over the edge. Just as you were about to leave the house to calm down again, a knock sounded at the door.

Philza gently pushed you behind him with furrowed brows and a hand on the sword hung around his hip. Techno’s book snapped shut as he stood up to grab his axe while Wilbur walked over to you and put a protective hand on your shoulder. You understood why they were cautious; you didn’t normally get visitors and the last time the house did, it was someone that decided to try and attack Technoblade on sight when he opened the door screaming about how hybrids aren’t natural. Keyword: tried. Techno absolutely would’ve killed him if it wasn’t for Philza holding him back. 

You felt anxiety creep up inside you as you fought against the small hisses trying to escape your mouth. The door opened slowly to reveal the store owner from a few days ago. His eyes hardened when he saw the wings sprouting from Philza’s back before his eyes flicked to you. He did not look happy to see you behind your dad’s massive wings. Without another word, you turned and ran up to your room when you felt the pressure become almost unbearable. 

You ran past Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo who were leaving Tommy’s room with hesitance. You didn’t respond when they tried to stop you. Slamming your door closed, you sat on your bed with your head clutched in your hands desperately trying to fight against the pressure building up. Small pops sounded on your skin as you grit your teeth in concentration. You could hear knocking at your door, thank god you locked it behind you. You had no idea how long you were sitting there trying to hold it back.

When the pressure became too much and you felt yourself losing grip on your control, you knew you needed to get out of the house as soon as possible. This was going to be a huge explosion, probably the biggest one you were going to do. The loud continuous hiss that left your throat was something you weren’t actively doing, another telltale sign that you were about to explode. You ripped open the door, pulled yourself from Tommy’s grasp, and ran as fast as you could downstairs. Philza followed you with a furious expression when he saw you, the store owner seemingly having left. 

“(Y/n), what in the hell did you do?” He grabbed your arm and pulled you to the living room. You tried your hardest to pull out of his grasp, but he was holding on too tight. The hissing had gotten slightly louder, but you moved a hand up to your mouth to try and muffle it. He sat you down on the couch and started pacing in front of you, his feathers puffed up angrily. Wilbur and Techno were eyeing you warily from across the room. 

“What were you thinking, blowing up his store like that? Were you even thinking? Cuz that was stupid (y/n). Hybrids get enough bad rap, and you go and pull this?!”

“Dad-”

“Not now Wilbur. As I was saying, you could’ve killed someone! What would you do then-”

“Dad,” Techno’s assertive tone stopped Philza in his tracks as he ran a hand down his face. “What could you possibly want right now, boys?”

“(Y/n)’s gonna explode soon.” Wilbur hurried over to you and helped you up. You could hear the three younger boys’ steps thundering down the stairs. By now, you were visibly shaking and sweating with the effort of holding explosions back. You could see the glowing of your freckles through the reflection of Wilbur’s glasses. 

“Shit,” Philza sounded panicked in that moment as Wilbur ushered you out of the house and into the forest. You pushed him away and stumbled your way deeper into the forest. You heard them attempting to follow you, but you gestured for them to get back. You had no idea how big this one was going to be, but it was definitely going to be large. 

You ran deeper into the forest until you couldn’t hold it back anymore. Leaning against a tree, you finally let yourself explode. This one was painful; your skin burned with every pop that emanated from your freckles, the burning making your free nerve endings scream at you. The last thing you saw was a wave of dirt splashing up before you blacked out. 

You were in and out of consciousness for the next week or so. Whenever you would wake up slightly, it would only be for a couple moments before you would pass out again. It was in those moments that the pain and the lack of energy hit you at full force. You supposed being unconscious was better than the mental and physical fog and the pain. 

By the time you fully woke up, your senses were slightly hyperactive, but nowhere near how you felt when you blew up that store. You reached up with a heavy hand to wipe at your crusty eyes before you heard rustling next to you. You looked over to see Philza standing at the door with a glass of water in his hand. When he saw that you were awake, he rushed to your side and helped you sit up. You took the water gratefully and drank it, the liquid refreshed your dry throat. 

“How’re you feeling?” 

“Tired and a little sore. How long was I out for?”

“About a week, you really worried us. That was a really big one. Do you know why it was so big?”

You nodded and looked down at the water in your hands, swirling it around the glass. You didn’t want to tell him about feeling angry and overwhelmed at every little thing around you the past few days. You felt guilty at that, they were just trying to live their lives while you were cursing them for merely existing. A finger under your chin made you look up at Philza. His eyes were full of gentleness and empathy, “c’mon, you can tell me. I want to help you.”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Start wherever you feel comfortable. Take as much time as you need.” He sat on the edge of your bed and looked around your room while he waited. You took a second to gather your thoughts before you took a deep breath. Philza perked up and diverted his full attention to you. 

“It started when I first blew up that guy’s store. I swear it was an accident that time, a cat snuck up on me and rubbed on me,” you shuddered, small hisses leaving your mouth. “The guy came out and picked me up by my shirt. He called us some names so I kinda got mad and blew up on purpose.”

“‘Us’?”

You nodded, “hybrids. He said that ‘our kind’ destroys everything.” You glared at the glass in your hands, hissing in contempt and watching the freckles dully glow green. “He called us ‘filthy mutts’ and freaks, Dad.” Philza looked slightly peeved at the name calling, “still, you shouldn’t’ve blown up on him. You could’ve killed him, (y/n).”

“So you’re saying that it’s okay for him to call us slurs? Should we just let people slander us?” You narrowed your eyes at him. He shook his head, his medium length blond hair swaying with the movement. “Hell no, I’m not saying that at all. You should never let someone call you things, but violence is never the answer.”

You huffed, crossing your arms, “frankly, he deserved what was coming to him. I just wish he didn’t throw me before I could blow up.” 

“Hold on, he fucking threw you?” You nodded and watched his eyes darken and anger flash across his face, “violence is sometimes the answer then. Did he hurt you?” 

“No, but I just felt so… so drained. But so overwhelmed at the same time. I’ve never exploded twice in the same day before.”

He hummed in realization, “so that’s why you slept through most of the day. Sorry, go on.”

“After Tommy woke me up everything just felt worse. It was like everything around me was amplified. It was hell, the last few days I was just hyper aware of everything and it was pissing me off. Every little thing drove me crazy, I could feel myself getting closer and closer to exploding but I held it back until I couldn’t anymore.” 

“(Y/n), you know that’s not healthy… I talked to Sam, you remember right?” You shook your head, “well, he was an old friend of Wilbur’s. He used to come here all the time before he had to move away. He’s a creeper hybrid like you,” he chuckled when you perked up, “he gave me some advice on your anatomy when you were growing up. Anyways, he told me that sensory overload is common when you explode. He said that it’s normal to feel drained afterwards and to definitely get plenty of sleep. The sensory issues apparently get worse if your rest is interrupted, so that was probably why you felt overwhelmed in the past few days… He also told me that it really isn’t healthy to explode more than once a day or to hold it in for longer than necessary. Please just come to me if you’re feeling overwhelmed again or if you need to rest after exploding. I can even build you an obsidian building where you could go and not blow up anything.”

“...I’d like that. What- what else did he tell you?” Philza chuckled and started to tell you more about what Sam told him about his anatomy. He even gave you Sam’s comms contact so you could contact him if you had any questions or wanted some advice. He was a nice man when you talked to him, always having an answer for your questions. You even found old pictures of you as a baby following him around. Apparently you could tell that he was part creeper; wherever he was in the house, you were bound to be near him.

The rest of the day, you hung out with the rest of your family and the bench trio. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Techno wasn’t one for open affection, being the type to give you little trinkets and giving you suggestions on what to read next. Every time you woke up, you would find small objects ranging from gold to emeralds and books on your nightstand. He would vehemently deny being the one that gave you the items, but you and the rest of the family knew better. Sometimes, he would drop into your room to ask you what you thought of the book and have a thorough discussion about it with you while you were recovering. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You leaned against Wilbur’s side with his arm wrapped around you. The hand that was around you was rubbing circles into your shoulder. After he scolded you for bottling up your emotions, he climbed into your bed and pulled you to his side. Small hums left his throat. 

“(Y/n)?” You hummed, your eyes half lidded and almost about to fall asleep. “Would you mind if I wrote a song about you? It would fit with the next album’s theme.” 

“Knock yourself out.” Your words were slightly slurred as you nuzzled closer to him. He laughed a bit, the sound being muffled and reverberating his chest. “Get some sleep. I’ll brainstorm some ideas to run by you before you wake up.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hanging out with the self proclaimed ‘bench trio’ was always fun, even if you were on strict orders to stay in bed by Dadza. Nobody argues with a concerned Dadza, but they found other ways to hang out with you. Tommy had moved his jukebox into your room and was playing cat, the music soothing you immensely and putting an end to your worries. However, what didn’t soothe you was the card game in front of you. 

You were watching in horror as everybody put down a plus two card stacking the amount the victim would have to draw. So far, the plus two streak had already gone around the circle once and is now going around once more. It was nearing your turn and it was with great horror that you realized you didn’t have a color changing card or a plus two card. The two cards in your hand felt heavy as you watched Ranboo pull out another card.

“Please Ranboo, I’ll do anything. Don’t put that card down.” You watched as his ears twitched before he smiled innocently at you, putting the card down and laughing at you when you started the long process of drawing fourteen cards and sorting them. 

“Sorry, my hand slipped.”

“Get fucked (y/n)!” Tommy cackled at you. You flipped him off before you went back to sorting the cards. Tubbo put down a plus four color changing card and smiled at Tommy. 

“Sorry Tommy, but uno and the color is now red!”

“Goddamnit Tubbo! That’s the one color I don’t have,” he grumbled and drew four cards. Ranboo smiled triumphantly and put down his last card before showing you his empty hands. “What?! You didn’t even say uno!” You eyed his smug smile with disbelief. 

“You guys didn’t call me on it though.”

“That’s not the rules, Ranboo! You have to say uno!” Tommy argued. Long story short, the rules had to be looked up and the family had to be consulted before your group came to the conclusion that you in fact do not have to call out uno and the other players could call them out on it. Eventually after a few tense games, the three were sitting on your bed. Ranboo had some difficulty with it due to his height, but he managed with his legs crossed. 

“(Y/n) do you reckon you could become charged if you were hit by lightning?”

“Tubbo, you’re a genius,” Tommy breathed out, “let’s go see!” 

“No, you will not go see. Sit back down.” Wilbur called out as he passed your room. The group slumped slightly. “We’ll see when I get better. Mark my words, the next thunderstorm that happens I will see if I can be charged.” You whispered to them, your eyes glinting with mischief. 

“I don’t really think that’s a good idea.”

“Of course it is, Ranboo. It probably won’t kill them.”

“Probably?” Ranboo raised an eyebrow at Tommy’s nonchalant answer. “Yes, probably.”

“I still have three lives left. If I die, I die.” You wove a hand in the air as you spoke and watched as Tubbo nodded in agreement. “Do it for science, (y/n).”

“Oh I will. For science!” You raised your water glass in the air and Tommy and Tubbo followed suit with wide smiles. “For science!”

You three turned to stare at a deadpanning Ranboo. He sighed before he raised his glass of milk and let out a monotone “for science.” You, Tommy, and Tubbo cheered as you clanked your glasses together. You could see a hint of a fond smile on Ranboo’s face as he watched you three chug your waters before he downed his milk in one swallow. 

You smirked at them and leaned close, talking lowly so that anyone passing by wouldn’t overhear you. “So, what’s our plan?”

General taglist (comment if you want to be added):

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[shadowofroses]

Neko-Sanemi Chronicles

Demon Slayer PART 2

Pairing: Tsugoku!Reader x Shinazugawa Sanemi

Warnings: Mainly language, Cat bites, Cat claws, mention of Brothels

Previously Might as well make it a Mini series

Summery: Genya stops by to ask Sanemi for girl advice, however he is indisposed. Following up with a Visit from Kocho.

Story:

Usually you were never this boisterous with language around anyone, except when you think you are alone, or talking to animals in general. Or rather, normal animals. You poured yourself a cup of tea and went to grab some Ohage and Sanemi nipped at your ankle again. “Look I’m not even sure if you can have Ohage as a cat, you’re gonna have to suck it up and eat raw fish…YOU FUCKER!” This time he bit down on your foot causing you to drop the Ohage, and he grabbed it with his mouth and simply hopped onto the counter to eat it in front of you smugly. 

You were as prim and proper as you could be around your Master. Sanemi found this side of you amusing as all hell, and wanted to keep riling you up now that he knew he could get you like this. 

The only good thing out of him becoming a cat. He might as well make the best of it.

You glared at him as you grabbed another Ohage to eat, “Better not have fucking Rabies…who am I talking to of course you have Rabies.” Sanemi bristled and meowed in response. 

Finishing up your breakfast you finally head outside, with the cat in tow. You frowned, looking around, “I guess it’s basic shit considering I can’t fight a cat…”

Sanemi tilted his head, he never heard you swear this much. He was starting to think he was rubbing off on you a little too much. He sat down, and watched you melee attack a target dummy, before getting out a sword and following through with practice swings, he would meow in approval. Moving to go into a thousand sword lunges, when the gates opened, and a taller boy walked in. You turned noticing the younger Shinazugawa, and the older one standing at attention. Tail straight up in the air regardless. 

“(Na-name), D-do you know where Brother is?” Genya questioned lightly red. He’s been trying to get used to your presence being around constantly, you however were still a female.

You wiped some sweat away from your forehead, the switch flicking in your head. “Oh! Hello Genya~ I am afraid….your brother is…um…how do I say this?” You bit your lip trying to think of ways to explain how he was away, cause the first thing your mind goes to was ‘he’s gonna kill ya’

Genya blinked as he looked down to the cat that was currently rubbing up against your legs. “You got a cat!” He grinned getting closer before he realized that meant getting closer to your bare legs due to you wearing a short skirt like Kanroji. His face went redder at the realization and fell backwards, which you knew Sanemi would have laughed his ass off. 

You were just confused in the first place, “Genya! Are you okay?!” You went to help him up but he just scooted back away. You stepped back sweat dropping, “My bad, um…the cat…you see….there is a very good logical explanation behind the cat….”

Genya tried to get closer to the cat only for the cat to hiss, and hide behind your legs again. KNOWING Genya wouldn’t get close to the cat, for being too embarrassed of getting too close to your legs. “I wonder if Brother has some fish in the fridge…”

You deadpanned, “Might as well make it Ohage, it stole mine this morning.” Sanemi nipped at your ankle for calling him an It. 

“It? The Cat?” 

“Yes…”

“Brother isn’t going to like that…”

“Your brother is the cat.”

“…”

Sanemi stretched out in response after bristling. You frowned looking down at him, and he looked up, “Don’t look at me like that, you know it’s going to get around that you fell to Demon Blood Art that turned you into a cat, especially if Uzui-sama was the one that dropped you off. You also know Kocho-Sama will tease you relentlessly once your normal again.” You then froze when you realized Sanemi’s eyes widened, and it wasn’t at what you said. You twitched. “You….stay.” 

You went to turn around to go back into the estate, Sanemi tried to follow you. Genya blinked, “huh? What’s going on?”

You deadpanned, “Your brother was being a pervert.” Genya’s face turned red as Sanemi launched himself at your shoulders digging in his claws and meowing loudly in your ear. You cried out, “GET THE FUCKER OFF OF ME!” Genya’s eyes widened as you swore. Especially with what you were referring to. He simply reached up grabbing Sanemi by the scruff causing Sanemi to go limp and purr in his hand. “Thank you…Sorry for the language.”

Genya snorted, “Nothing I haven’t heard before especially from brother. I’m just surprised.” 

You sighed going into the estate to change out of your skirt and into pants. Coming back out, Genya was cradling the cat, scratching the back of the neck, and his ears causing him to be very complacent. “Maybe you should take care of your brother, I can’t stand cats…”  Sanemi hissed jumping onto your shoulder and just sitting there. “Are you a cat, or a parrot?”  You deadpanned again. Genya only snickered. “Anyway what was it that you needed Genya?”

Genya blinked, “Oh…I uh…” his face went red, “I…uh…wanted uh his advice on…uh asking a girl out…” 

Silence. You smiled, “I think I’d be the better one to ask instead of your brother anyway.”

“You think so?”  Genya rubbed the back of his neck. 

You looked forward, “Well I would assume asking a girl would be better instead of a guy that doesn’t have a girlfriend and goes to brothels.” 

NIP 

Genya’s eyes widened, “He goes to bro-brothels?!” You got nipped harder. 

You looked over to Sanemi who was glaring, “What, was that supposed to be a bloody secret? You’re very fucking open about it.” He bristled in response. 

Genya laughed nervously, “Yeah..um…no I uh…I thought you and my brother were dating honestly.”

This time this caught both you and Sanemi’s attention. “Heh?” From you and a weird sound from Sanemi. 

“I mean just the fact that you moved into the estate and the way people talk!”

You tilted your head, “I thought that was what Tsugoku’s were supposed to do if they didn’t have anywhere else to live…wait hold up Genya. Who the fuck is saying I’m dating Shi——Sanami?” You were going to go into saying their last name, but they were both there and wanted to specify. Sanemi’s ears popped up at attention too. 

Genya went red, “Mitsuri-sama says you two are cute together, and get along. Uzui-sama said it would be a waste if brother wasn’t…Zenitsu is convinced you two are dating.”

You took a deep breath trying to understand the logic. “Wait, so apparently me putting up with your brothers attitude long enough to actually get along and train is…”You squint your eyes, “we haven’t even done anything to signify that…what…” Sanemi blinked, tilting his head as well. 

“Mitsuri-sama says he stares like a…um…lover…and Uzui-sama said brother muttered your name in his sleep….” Your eyes widened with this information as Sanemi launched himself at Genya’s face claws out causing the boy to cry out. 

How dare he just state those facts so openly, Sanemi thought. 

“SANEMI!” You quickly went to grab him. “Cut that out or I’ll neuter you!” Sanemi looked back hissing loudly, like ‘you wouldn’t dare’. Genya blanched at the threat. You grabbed him by the scruff this time and just held him as he purred annoyed, not doing a thing except hang there. You pulled the body into your chest instinctively  “Side note you might want to warn Uzui-sama that you told me about these uh…confessions and your brother's response to it. That way he can be prepared when Sanemi is finally human again.” You sighed, “Besides, I doubt they are true anyway, and if it did ever happen I would have to find a way to remove myself as his Tsugoku.” You didn’t notice how Sanemi’s eyes sharpened at that. You moved forward and placed a hand on Genya’s face causing him to go red. “Sanemi did a number on you, come on, I’ll put a salve on the scratches.”

Sanemi wiggled in your arms as you tried to lead the younger brother into the estate, Genya shook his head. “It-It’s fine. Not like I’m missing a hand. It’ll heal. Thank you though.” he bowed slightly. “I-I should go now…”

You frowned at that, “Hold on, didn’t you want some advice?” Genya rubbed the back of his neck, before you came to a realization. “Actually nevermind, I’ve never had a relationship before, you’re best off asking Uzui-sama for advice. He probably would have better advice, he does have three wives after all…” you muttered, Sanemi scoffed. 

Genya nodded, “Ri-right, we-well I hope brother becomes normal again soon.” The boy waved and walked off the grounds of the Estate. 

You went to reenter the estate, however, you heard a voice, “Ara ara, what’s this?” 

You felt the cat twitch in your arms. “Ah! Kocho-sama, I had a feeling you would be coming soon. Please come into the Estate, I’ll fix you some tea and snacks while you draw Sanem-Shinazugawa-sama’s blood.” You lightly blushed at your mix up and shook your head. 

Of course it was noticed by both Sanemi and Shinobu. “Oh? I’ll take some tea, but I’m not hungry. This shouldn’t take long.”

You placed Sanemi on the Chabudai for Shinobu while you went forth into the kitchen to heat up some tea. You heard a hiss and a loud Meow. And a “Don’t be a prick Shinazugawa. (Name) will be back, now just let me draw some blood.” 

You shrugged off the conversation, grabbing the tea pot you went to walk back into the dining area.

[kkusuka]

Haikyuu kinks setter eddition <33

here is the ace eddition 

here is the Middle blocker version

Includes: Kageyama Tobio, Oikawa Tooru, Sugawara Koshi, Atsumu Miya, Semi Eita, Shirabu Kenjiro, Kanji Koganegawa, Akaashi Keji, Kenma Kozume,  Yahaba Shigeru and  Keishin Ukai

Cw: pet play, degradation, humiliation, cock warming, cuckolding, bare baking, public sex, photography,   (those are the more serious one, every thing else should be fine <3) 

and here we go!

oh he is so pretty

Kageyama Tobio

Oral

It goes both ways too

He could append the rest of his life in between your thighs and that’s that

But that would mean missing the slice of heaven you give him when you go down on him

And he doesn't think he could live without that, you're just that good 

Little secret for you : he will literally be putty in your hands if you suck his balls, it will literally send him into outer space 

Vanilla sex

NOT IN THE BAD WAY

HE LIKES IT FOR A GOOD REASON

DON’T KILL ME

He just likes to be in love with you 

It's his awkward version of love making, but he’ll burn up if you call it that

Just looking you in the eyes and softly thrusting in you 

Holding your hand 

Soft kisses and whispers of love 

AWWW he’s so soft for you.

Cockwarming 

This is really only foe when he wants to have sex

But also wants to watch old tapes of volleyball games

Normally tricks you into it, he’ll say he wants to fuck on the couch, y’all start to do it and he just stops gets you on his lap and watches

You don't like that too much

But when he harshly thrusts up everytime you whine telling you he won't let you cu for a week

Then you start to behave

But no worries he’ll eventually let you grind on him like whore, and he’ll play with your nipples until you've came

Your still not moving tho

Sensory deprivation 

This is a control tactic 

He goes all you for this

When he wants control he gets it 

The most common thing when this side of Kags comes out is having you kneel on the floor

Well kneeling with your legs tied in the position, your arms tied behind your back

with earmuffs and a blindfold

With a vibrator torturing your poor hole. 

Oh! And either a spider gag or a ball gag!

It's just you and never ending pleasure until he wants to indulge <3

(look at him walking, he does it so well) 

Oikawa Tooru

Public sex & Humiliation

Specifically riding 

Sitting you on his lap and pretending nothing is going on, while he’s really 8 inches deep

He’ll make you reach down and folder his ball to help HIM get off, for you? Well i guess you’ll just have to bounce a bit now wont you!

Knowing that to everyone else you two just look like a regular couple enjoying a bowl of ramen makes him love defiling you in public even more. 

Aw. Are you embarrassed? You can’t be that ashamed if your fucking yourself on me

You never know how far he will take it either

One time when you were at dinner with Tooru and some of his friends, he had sat you in his lap and spread your legs for them to see

You were so embarrassed, even more when he started cooing in your ear about how much of a show whore you were

You couldn't look his friends in theirs eyes for a few hours

Gangbangs/ Cuckolding 

You already know he believes in sharing is caring!

And he sure knows how to share!

You're just too perfect to not share with Makki, Mattsun, and Iwa!

And have you seen his friends, you’d like to give it a try

And he practically begged you to do it, and you can't deny a pretty boys puppy dog eyes

No one can deny the puppy dog  eyes

He never thought anything could beat the feeling of being on the court, but seeing you trying to fit Mattun in your weeping hole and deepthroating iwa may just do the trick

Watching his friends fuck you may just be his favorite pass time

Cum eating 

H e  i s  a  w h o r e 

He tries to tell you it's to make you “clean” 

Yup, he sucks all of his friends cum out of you to make sure you're all his. 

Oh! Sometimes Iwa will cum in your mouth and make Tooru make out with you until all the cum is gone between the two of you!

Praise 

This is practically in all aspects of life

But when hes fucking you he wants to hear how amazing he’s making you feel

Yeah, his dick hits that perfect spot doesn't it? 

He wants to hear it

He wants to hear EVERYTHING 

His hips feel good against your thighs? Say it and loudly too!

Sugawara Koshi

Slight pet play

He really just wants someone to take care of

And what better way to do that then have his puppy by his side. 

And it keeps him grounded

He’ll be all frustrated then he just looks at you

On your knees looking back up at him

And all of a sudden everything is ok again. 

Body worship 

Mostly from him to you

He just thinks you are so perfect

Sometimes he just wants you to stirp so he can spend hours just exploring your body

He’ll lay you down and just tell you how beautiful you are over and over

When he’s in a caring mood everything he does will be accompanied with a sweet compliment 

Just let him do his thing <3

Caregiver 

We saw this coming 

Suga-momma will do anything for you

Had a bad day, ok he’ll let you use his cock to get off

You’ll feel better. 

But, this is everyday life too

He sometimes helps dress you up.

He packs your lunch for work,  always with a little note expressing his love for you

He just loves to know that you are comfortable and that you feel loved by him all the time. 

Slight medical / doctor 

I just feel like he wants you to be “healthy” 

He’ll have a whole set up too

He’ll strap your legs up and “examine” his baby

And once he is sure all is well, 

He’ll just fuck you then and there

if only he were real

Atsumu Miya

Dirty talk / Degradation 

This is literally cannon-

He calls you all the names in to book

The favorite? He can't bring himself to choose 

They all have different tones!

He does like to use “Cocksleve” more than often!

If you didnt know any better you would truly believe that he only thinks of you as a hole to fuck. 

“ yes, clench just like that Cum-rag, you're too good at this”

“God, you’re hole loves my cock, i should just keep you here and fuck you or the rest of your life, leave you dripping in my cum all day and night” 

He just LOVES doing this act

"Are you my slut?"

"Yes"

"Tell me you're my slut"

"I'm your slut"

"Say it again"

"I'm your slut"

He could live just hearing that everyday (not really but he says it to show how happy he is-) 

Overstimulation  

A built in ego boost

He loves seeing you messy and  begging

He doesn't even listen to what you're begging. More? Stop? 

Yeah well he doesn't listen anyway, he’ll do it until he wants to stop

Just hold your legs up, let him see your slutty hole and let him work

He’ll make you feel good, he always does :)

Dacryphilia  

You just look so goddamn pretty

He literally makes you cry to get to comfort you

As in comfort i mean fuck you to sleep

He doesn't do it that often but he always makes it worth it when he does

Is it bad that he likes to have you sob on his dick?

He’s not a monster tho!

Your consent is key!

(we stan a king) 

Pet play 

Puppy

He has a full leash for you

But when he feel especially cold he makes you eat on the floor 

And out of a bowl :(

But only when he’s in a seriously bad mood, but just having you listen to him so weak makes him feel so much better!

Just let him indulge in this, it makes him feel better that he’s in control 

Extra little thing for tsumu

He records you two 

He doesn't even bother to put them in a hidden folder either

They are just in between all the regular pictures

AND he screenshots your  your nudes, prints some of them out and tapes them to his wall

Samu thinks you look very nice :)

he his the meaning of pretty

Akaashi Keji

Toys 

He loves to have you rides dildo in front of him

Or he’ll have a bullet vibrator in you while grocery shopping.

He plugs you up anytime he’s not in you. 

You can bet that if he’s not fucking you you're either fucking yourself, or being fucked by a little machine

And there is a method to his madness

But he will never tell you

He does all of this to see you, he likes to watch you and all your faces

You just look so adorable clenching your eyes shut and blabbering about nothing 

He just like basking in your beauty  

Oh he is so precious (and so are you) 

Light bondage 

He really only does this to show control

He can't let you get too full of yourself now

You’re still all his.

And he’ll put you in your place any second

He gives you control, and you need to play by the rules

If not. He’ll just tie you up and not look at you for as long as he see fits

You should’ve just listened to him

Cockwarming  

Akaashi is constantly working!

Sometimes he just wants you near him when he gets his work done

You’re also a calming factor to him

Sometimes he get so stressed and can only respond to it by thrusting into you a few times and kissing hickeys into your neck

But after the first time, he fell in love with it!

Watching a movie? 

He wants to be in you

But he’ll hug you close and press you against him, and he’ll cuddle into you

You guys have even fallen asleep while doing it

(oh to fall asleep while cockwarming Akaashi) 

Cuckolding  

Again, he works so much

And sometimes he just doesn’t have the energy to fuck you :(

Well thankfully, he has a best friend who is always very pent up and ready to fuck!

He could tell you weren't sure at first but after him reassuring it was fine and being non-stop fucked for 3 hours by a professional volleyball player

He could tell you liked it. 

So, when he feels like he won't make you feel as good as he can, Bokuto is already on the phone walking out of his apartment!

like a little potted plant

Kenma Kozume

Cockwarming 

Gamer boy wants you as close to you for as long as possible. 

Sometimes he resents that he streams because he can't have you on his dick

You also help to manage his game ginger

When you're there he doesn't yell as much or throw is controller 

Instead he places the remote down, he takes a deep breath and hugs you

He’s like a cat when he gets like this

He’ll be nestled in your neck- practically purring

Before continuing his game.. 

Cuckolding 

In simple terms 

He likes watching Kuroo fuck you

Like he REALLY likes seeing Kuroo dick you down

We all know he’s not the confrontational type, so when you’re being bad, his only opinion is to call his best friend

He cat tell you like it too because you take any chance you can to act up

But he always makes sure they you know your all his before the end of the night. 

Photography 

Being someone whose life revolves around social media 

It is absolutely no surprise that he likes to have visal pieces of you to take with him wherever he goes. 

 He specifically likes mirror nudes, with those cat ear thigh highs that he got you.

You remember one time he went on a trip to another city and asked you to send him some stuff

And in return he sent a little video of him jacking off, and thus it became a tradition every time you were away from the other. 

Slight Pet play

Mostly leashes collars and pet names. 

he does not take it that far,but he likes to know his kitten listens to him.  

The worst it got was when he put a dog leash on you and walked you around the apartment when Kuroo was over

You did receive the teasing of your life but good kittens don't speak

And you oh so desperately wanted to be a good Kitten for Kenma. 

tounge

Semi Eita

Under the influence 

You and I both know this man smokes-

And smoking just happens to make him horny

Like really horny

And if you're there next to him he’s not gonna jack off??

You guys have sex almost every time he smoke

And when you smoke? 

Oh he just cant help himself, you look so pretty eyes glazed over 

He’ll make you say so so much better. 

Recording

He has a folder on his computer

And another on his phone

And all saved to his cloud

Of what? 

Videos of you fucking

And a select few of sucking his dick

And what does he do with all of these? 

He watches them, sometimes with you in the room

Like you too are hanging out and suddenly he’s on his computer watching you bounce on his dick. 

Nudes

Clearly he likes to have you naked on a screen somewhere

And when he’s in public he can't exactly start watching homemade porn

so , he has a solution!

Make you send as many nudes as you can before he has to go out!

He has no shame for it either

One of your more “artistic” photos became his lockscreen

Which you begged him to remove considering his bandmates had begun to make comments about it. 

Hair pulling 

He does it all the time

And he does it  so hard too

Every time he hits from behind

His hand is on your head and already pulling 

Or when you suck him off

I'll pull your hair up, then push your whole head back down 

And repeat. 

oh my god i am in love with him

Shirabu Kenjiro

Degradation 

This man has a mouth

And a mean one 

AND a killer attitude

And he spares you none of that. 

He ridicules and demands, dehumanizes, and you love it

“Admit you’re just a whore, getting off on being a hole. Disgusting” 

Over the weekends, why you have nothing to do, he makes you stay around the house completely naked 

“You're flaunting all you have like a prostitute, that's what you want right? O be used like a street whore?” 

He’s just a mean guy :p

Humiliation

It just makes sense at this point

He really likes to makes you take off your panties when you wear skirts in public

Then he likes to have you bend down and grab things for him

Or 

He’ll have you sit, man spreading, but the catch is there is a huge hole in your pants, so anyone at the right angle can see everything. 

Of course none of this goes without witty comments and insults from bang boy. 

Bondage 

He loves having you weak in front of him

It’s a total power trip for him

Like everything the two of you do, it consist of you being a good whore and him being a big ole meanie

He’ll leave you tied up for hours with a fuck machine pounding your poor hole

Or hell have you with a spider gag in and he’ll make you grind into the floor

He’ll laugh at you 

Record you and he’s even sent videos of youtube some of his old teammates

This one time, he had you tied up to your bedpost and just left, he walked out of the room and you didn't even know how long it was until he came back. 

Pet play

You were mouthing off to him? Oh no they won't do

He pretty much uses it as leverage against you

Good pets so mouth off do they? 

No? What I thought.

Its a form of punishment mostly

Keeping you kneeling on the floor below him for hours while he studies

He makes you eat down there

And he’ll pet your head, but if you even think about leaning into it, he’ll stop 

He’s so mean :(

bird boiiiii

Kanji Koganegawa

Pegging 

He’s a baby

A pretty baby, that anyone would like a chance to ruin. 

He probably didn't even know what is was and still agreed, but no he begs for it

And who are you to deny your baby? 

It was kinda hard at first considering he was so big, but you managed, and are very good at making him cum, like really really good. 

Hand kink 

He really just likes to see how much bigger his hands are 

He’ll grab your handd and thread your fingers together, your hands are just so soft, opposite of his

He also likes to stick his fingers in your mouth and likes when he gets to suck on yours. 

Ddlb / Dmlb

There is no explanation other then he’s baby

And he needs to be taken care of, before he dose something stupid 

And you love taking care of your overgrown baby :)

He’s all smiley and cute when you do!

How could you resist? 

his grandpa is hotter but whatever 

you didnt see that.

Keishin Ukai

Public sex

In his store 

On the counter

Five Minutes before closing time 

It cannon

It's the risk factor for him, anyone can just walk in and see you fall apart on his cock

It's actually happened before, Shin wanted to do it and you agreed but didn't expect Takeda to waltz in and look directly at you. 

Yeah he immediately came then shoved you onto the floor to hide you from Ittetsu’s prying eyes

Daichi has also heard the two of you fucking in the gym storage closet, but chose not to say anything. 

Barebacking

It's like a primal urge to him

Condoms are annoying ang time consuming, you guys are gonna be together anyways might as well let him fill you like a good fuck toy

When he cums in you he also doesn't let you clean it out

He makes you stand there, face three inches away from your core, and watches his cum drip from you

Condoms won't let him do that, will they?

Humiliation

I mean he’s into fucking you in public, so this is pretty much a must at this point

He puts you in these positions so you have no choice but to be embarrassed

I mean what kind of slut like getting fucked in plain sight?

When you go out with him he makes you wear all these ridiculous outfits that practically show everything

And he makes fun of you when they look! 

Pornography 

Yes as in homemade porn

Why would he keep you all to himself?

Everyone deserves to experience that

And people love you!

If the thousands of comments and requests say anything about it!

oh to do that to Maddog

Yahaba Shigeru

Choking 

We all saw the scene with Maddog 

Come on, he’ll do that to anyone

I feel like he just likes seeing his hands around your neck. 

He likes how fail you are and how is ands just wrap around your neck

He knows where to squeeze too

He’ll hold your pressure point to the pint you think your gonna pass out

Light BDSM

Nothing to crazy, he likes having you tied up and ready that's all

Maybe eagle spread on the bed?

Or hell have you kneeling next to him, arms tied behind your back mouth ready and opened

The possibilities are endless

Fingering 

He likes his hands- 

But it's mostly about you

Seeing your hole up close

It sucking his fingers, like a good hole should

Plus he has better control with his fingers, so he hits all the good spots over and over until yout crying <3

[sohin-ace]

Kakyoin - Fateful Day

Kakyoin x Jotaro's sister reader

I freaking love the Joot-sister prompt

You were always used to Jotaro and you walking separatedly from and to school. The guy had way longer legs than you and would rather not be seen with you in public and near school, for reasons mysterious to you.

At first you felt offended that he would be ashamed of you, or just not bear your presence.

You did not know, in fact, that the reasons he kept his distance from you as much as he could when on schoolgrounds or when going to school, was to protect you from danger.

Not only was Jotaro constantly surrounded by crazy girls who would probably harass you for existing in his world, but he also had troubles, to understate, with local delinquents and other gangsters who wanted to throw some hands at him.

Furthermore, with the new discovery of that bizarre, seemingly evil spirit that started following him around, you were really the last person he wanted to hurt.

Unfortunately, being distant from his little sister wasn't near enough to protect her this time.

One fateful day, soon after your grandfather arrived in Japan and Jotaro got out of holding, you were walking home from school as usual.

Jotaro was already a solid five minutes away in front of you, which meant you were all alone.

You didn't mind the lone walk, the town was peaceful and you were used to it. But something irked you when you felt an insistant presence behind you.

You turned around, checking, but no one was there. You shrugged the feeling off, feeling a bit stupid for thinking the worse and kept walking, telling yourself it must have been a cat or an innocent someone who got home.

"Jotaro~! Welcome back- hm? Where is your sister?" Holly asked as she welcomed her son who just came home.

The boy grunted, reluctantly accepting his 'welcome home' smooch. "She's coming. She's just slow."

After a long while of waiting for your return, Holly started to worry, stress and anxiety clouding her mind. Panicked, she barged in Jotaro's bedroom. You weren't usually this late.

"Jotaro, are you sure Y/N was behind you? It's been almost thirty minutes and she's still not back…"

Jotaro huffed in annoyance as he got up from his laid down position on his bed.

"Yare yare daze, quit worrying over nothing, she's probably fine."

" 'Probably'?!"

"What's going on, Holly?" Joseph joined in after hearing the commotion.

"Y/N's not back from school yet… I'm scared something might have happened to her…" Holly explained to her father, dread even more evident in her voice as she worded her worries.

Joseph rubbed her shoulder in reassurance, "It's okay, Holly, I'm sure she's not that far. Jotaro! Get up and go look for your sister! You're supposed to keep an eye on her, that's your role as a big brother!"

The old man scolded as the teenager stood up and got on his way, as if he had been asked an annoying chore.

"Yare yare, you're all so noisy over nothing." He put his shoes back on and took his leave.

Stopping every once in a while and unable to shake off your uneasy feeling truly delayed you. You were sure you'd never hear the end of this if your father knew how late you were today.

"Kujo..." A sudden deep voice called right behind you, and you turned around, meeting with a complete stranger. "…Am I correct?"

"Yes?" You replied a bit shyly as you turned fully to him. "And you are...?"

As you now had a better look at him, you realised how handsome he actually looked. Not at all how you imagined a potential creep following you.

He wore your school's uniform but you didn't recognize his face. He must be a new student, you told yourself. He had beautiful red hair and a white shawl that flew gracefully in the wind. He was also strongly and elegantly built. Just who was he?

But all that charm quickly shifted as he smirked eerily in response. He approached you, his eyes glaring into your soul and you stepped backwards as fear built up inside you. Why was he looking at you like that so suddenly?

The uneasiness from before came up tenfold, this time completely justified. You spoke up as he came uncomfortably close to you, towering over your much smaller form.

"U-um… Did you need something…?" You hesitantly stuttered as he now stood arm-length away from you.

"Yes I do." He spoke confidently, his goal like set in stone. "I need you to lead me to your brother."

"What? My brother? If it's a fight you want with him, I won't let you." You protested with more confidence, now that you started to understand where he came from.

You were used to people trying to pick fights with Jotaro. You knew your brother had way too many enemies for his own good, and surely you wouldn't let anyone get to him and filter them out if you had the occasion.

"Who even are you? I don't recognize you from school…" You squinted your eyes warily. This boy arised too many questions in your mind.

Kakyoin smiled softly at you, which you didn't trust at all. He was fishy and there was something in his eyes that you quite couldn't put you finger on.

"My name is Kakyoin Noriaki." He sighed. "I didn't want to use force on a lady, but you don't leave me any choices..."

Before you could even react, green tentacle-like appendices appeared from behind him and lunged at you. You gasped and bolted away as fast as you could.

You knew it. It was bad. Real bad. You had no chance against a Stand user like him, you couldn't manage your own newly found Stand just yet. It was exactly like your grandfather said.

You tried to run, but not even 2 meters far and his green vectors wrapped around your ankles.

As you were about to trip and land on the floor, more of the tentacles wrapped around your legs, waist, arms and wrists, preventing you from falling, keeping you still in mid-air.

You couldn't move. Kakyoin came up behind you as you struggled in Hierophant Green's grip.

"Well that was easy." He snickered over your tied up and desperate form.

"LET ME GO!! LET ME- HMMFF!" He put a large hand over your mouth, effectively silencing your now muffled screams.

"Shhh! Don't make this harder for us, I'll just borrow your body real quick. It'll be over before you even know it. I'll make this painless, I'm a gentleman."

He released your mouth and Hierophant green squeezed itself around your neck, choking you, your mouth agape for you desperately needed air.

He took this advantage to grab your wrists and lock you against his chest as his Stand released you to nest itself inside your opened mouth.

Your body tensed up at the foreign and disgusting feeling of the spirit slipping down your throat and you violently squirmed in Kakyoin's grip as he forced your mouth closed, keeping the Stand inside to own your will and possess you. Just as Dio had taught him.

"Good. That's good. Jotaro would never kill his own sister, now would he? Even though his own sister will kill him. How tragically ironic."

He wrapped his arms back to your midsection as you stopped squirming, tired and breathless from fighting against him in vain. He held you against him as he knew you would surely collapse if he let go.

"Haaah… Ahh… Haaaa… Haaahh…" You panted shakily, scared and exhausted as your head hung low and your cold hands rested upon his own, barely able to swat them away from you with how shakey you were.

You were weak and alone, which was perfect for him to use. He chuckled and you felt the rumble of his chest against your back as he did. You felt like crying.

"It's too bad that you have to die. You're so cute, I would have loved to bring you to Master Dio with me."

You suddenly felt nauseous. You felt his stand inside you, trying to slide itself into every part of you and take control of your body.

You tried to resist, your arms and legs were shaking, your arched your back and writhed in pain, you knew your own Stand was fighting against it.

To Kakyoin's utter shock, Hierophant Green was violently pushed out of you by your own Stand as you let out lung-piercing coughs. Spitting the enemy out like some flesh-eating parasyte.

"WHAT-?!" Kakyoin yelped at the scene, but was then forced to let go of you as your Stand punched Hierophant Green in the face, the red-head owner feeling the hit full-force as well.

Kakyoin fell down, knocked down by the impact as you collapsed to your knees, coughing up and vomiting spit and blood.

Adrenaline pushing you through, you didn't let yourself any time to recover and took this chance to run away as fast as you could, taking sharp turns and passing through narrow paths that you prayed he wouldn't fit through or have the idea of searching.

You eventually lost track of him, gasping desperately for air as your lungs hurt in a dry and sharp pain, fed by the ceaseless pounding of your heart. Your legs were shaking uncontrollably, you couldn't take it anymore.

Right as you passed the Torii gate of the temple nearest to your neighborhood, one you walked through every day, you passed out cold onto the paved holy ground.

Jotaro slowly walked his way back to the path you usually both took to come home after school. He walked and walked, but still no trace of you on the way.

Although he would never admit it, his anxiety grew inside him and his heartbeat quickened as he realised that you were way too far from home for his own liking. You were right behind him, how could this happen?

He started to feel guilty that he didn't even check if you were still following him or not. Especially when he realized that so many people, people who yearned to get under Jotaro Kujo's skin, could easily do so by taking you down and harming you, his own sister.

His train of thoughts were interrupted when he found something, or rather someone on the stoned floor of the local temple. And as he approached the figure, sure enough, his eyes widened and his heart jumped in his chest. No...

"Y/N…!"

He immediately kneeled down next to you and lifted you to his lap. He checked you up and down for injuries and noticed you had fresh bruises forming on your wrists and neck and you were bleeding from your mouth. He could not believe what he was seeing.

"Aah… Jojo…" you whimpered in a wheeze as you recognized your brother's voice and his smokey scent.

"Who did this to you? What's the name of that fucking asshole?!" He growled, his gruff voice contrasting with the care he held you with.

"H-he's a stand user like you… Kakyoin… He's after you, don't go to school tomorrow…" You croaked and coughed out while looking up at his worried eyes and your brother scoffed.

"Yare yare, you're stupid to think I won't go to school and drum his ass."

He lifted you up and carried you back home to get your injuries treated. As to be expected, Holly freaked out at your state and Jotaro received a earful from Joseph who told him to never let a young girl walk all by herself, let alone his little sister and especially with all the trouble he gets into.

The next day, you stayed home to rest for the day, making you feel much better. Thankfully you had no major injuries and the Speedwagon foundation doctors knew about Stand inflicted wounds.

You had interesting chats with the guest Abdul and Joseph spoiled you all day like you were his baby which, to be fair, you were in his eyes.

In the mean time, Jotaro had met with Kakyoin and had an inevitable fight. Unfortunately, what Kakyoin had going on was much deeper than just wanted to bully Jotaro. When Jotaro came back home, he brought Kakyoin's unconscious body and you learned about what happened to him, about Dio, the fleshbud, and why he aimed at killing Jotaro.

Knowing what had transpired and with you doing much better, you decided to go check on the boy. You felt it was important to start allover with him.

You knocked gently on the guest room's door and slid it open, revealing Kakyoin in his injured state. Your brother truly did not hold back, you thought.

"Hello Kakyoin…" You greeted a bit shyly as you walked through the door. The red head looked at you with wide eyes as he recognized you.

"Y-...you're the girl I attacked yesterday?" You nodded and he sighed sadly. "I'm deeply sorry for what I did… That was.... Despicable of me..."

"Don't worry," You approached him and knelt down at his side. "My grandfather explained what happened to you. I'm not mad. You weren't yourself."

Kakyoin then glanced at your bruised neck and looked away in shame.

"I can't believe I harmed a girl… in such a low, awful way…" You chuckled lightly at his exaggerated worry.

"Hey, I'm fine! Look, you're in an even worse state than I am. Stop fretting and let us take care of you, okay?" You gently smiled at him.

He looked at you with a soft gaze. He bit his lip and blinked back the tears that prickled in his eyes. Were all members of this family pure redempting angels of sympathy and goodness?

"Thank you, Kujo, you're very kind..."

"Just call me Y/N." You smiled as you leaned in to move out some hairs that were stuck to his frontal bandage.

"Y/N…" He softly repeated, a blush rising to his face. Even your name was beautiful, he thought to himself, never daring to say it out loud.

His heart fluttered in his chest at your feathery touch and he felt suddenly much shier. He wanted to hold that soft hand in his own, but before he could even do anything, Holly called your name from afar.

"Y/N! Can you please come here for a second?"

"I'm coming!" You replied before looking back at the boy. "Sorry, I have to go. I'll let you rest until dinner is ready."

Kakyoin nodded and laid back down on the mattress. He let out a soft 'oh' of surprise when you gripped the blanket and tucked him in sweetly before getting up and leaving, sliding the door close behind you.

He sighed, unable to fight his little goofy grin.

"Damn it… I'm falling in love…"

Old writing again. I'm really just putting the dusty stuff I should have posted a year ago. I apologize for the poor litterature.

[offbrandhange]

AOT if you were sick | 𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

Headcanons on how some of the AOT boys would help/comfort you when sick! :)

Characters: Armin, Connie, Eren, Erwin, Jean, Levi, Niccolo, Reiner,

Gender: Neutral, no references to readers’ gender ! :)

a/n: I haven’t been feeling well lately so badabam badaboom here we go. Also I am trying a new format because I’m pretty sure when I write the bullet points it looks wonky on mobile?...I dunno man :/

𝕬𝖗𝖒𝖎𝖓 𝕬𝖗𝖑𝖊𝖗𝖙 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

Right off the bat, Armin would ask what your symptoms are. Immediately after telling him he’d rush out to the pharmacy to pick up meds, and probably some comfort food, too.

How does he comfort you?

Armin would comfort you by bringing you things you need like medicine, wet towels, clean clothes, food, etc. Constantly, and I mean constantly asking if you want anything.

He probably would also set up a little sick-station in the living room with a blanket, pillow, cup of water, wet towel, bowl of soup, etc. and put on a TV show you like and just...chill while you watch or nap (if you fall asleep midway through).

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

Only if you were super sick. He would 1000% be worried about you while at work, though. You’d get “How are you doing” messages every hour, and he’d totally end up annoying the sh*t out of his co-workers for constantly talking about you being ill. Armin would probably also pick up a little snack/gift for you on his way home.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Most likely not. Armin would be scared he’d get sick too, and then you’d have to take care of him. If you begged him for a quick kiss, or you really whined for some cuddles, then maybe he’ll indulge.

𝕮𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖎𝖊 𝕾𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖗 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

“Dang bro, that sucks.” And that’s all he says.

How does he comfort you?

I think if you asked him for something, he’d get you it willingly and eagerly, but otherwise he’s clueless; He assumes you’re good if you don’t say anything.

Connie would comfort you by hanging out with you. Most likely, he’d sit you down on the couch and play video games with you, like Mario Kart; or he’d show you him killing a really hard boss. I think he’d also send you funny videos/tiktoks, and I mean like, the really dumb ones, where it’s like...a fart sound effect over an image of a truck. Or a, “Can I touch that badonkadonk fool?”

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

Yup, especially if you asked. I feel like Connie would take any chance he could to take off work, and you being sick would be his opening. He wouldn’t leave you alone all day, either; You’re stuck with him.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Connie does not care if you’re sick. You’re gonna get the same amount of treatment, maybe more if you whine and snuggle into his chest. He thinks you’re even more cute when you’re sick.

𝕰𝖗𝖊𝖓 𝕵𝖆𝖊𝖌𝖊𝖗 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

Eren would say something like, “Oh. Are you alright?” If you said no, he’d make you a snack or ask if you want anything. Afterwards he would chill with you and probably cuddle or snuggle you. I doubt he would really worry, he’d be real calm about it.

How does he comfort you?

He’d bring you something if you needed it. The only time I could see him getting fussy about it though, is if you interrupted him while he was totally invested in a video game or on a work call.

Most definitely snuggles with you in bed. Probably would do something to tease you too, kissing down your neck and saying “Are you better yet? How about now? Are you better yet?” I can see Eren being totally down for an afternoon nap together anytime you wanted.

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

He would ask you if you wanted/needed him to. If you said yes he would, even if you weren’t really sick. Likewise, if you said you’re fine, but were far from fine, he’d call BS and stay home too; if you kept saying he didn’t need to, it’s very likely his stubborn a*s would argue with you and take off anyways.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Definitely. Eren would still, probably even more than usual, baby the ever-loving sh*t out of you. There’s no escaping his cuddles, kisses, or more...sexual activities.

𝕰𝖗𝖜𝖎𝖓 𝕾𝖒𝖎𝖙𝖍 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

Erwin, like Armin, would ask what’s wrong right away. Except he would completely annoy you by asking a million f*cking questions about your symptoms. He’d probably google them too and list a ton of possibilities that are so far-fetched. He’d end up scaring HIMSELF and forcing you to go to the doctor.

How does he comfort you?

Up your A**. Every five seconds he would be like, “Need something? You’re sure? You’re sure you’re sure? I know I was here five minutes ago, yeah, but I’m just making sure. So you’re sure?”

Pets your head, ruffles your hair. Goes out to pick up medicine, snacks, maybe even flowers. Probably tries to brush your teeth for you. You know, Erwin things.

Would they take/call off work for you?

Y E S. Yes. This man would call off the whole WEEK. He wouldn’t leave you alone, either. The whole damn day he’d be breathing down your NECK. Even if the only discomfort you felt was a scratchy throat. He’d make you call off work too.

Are they still physically affectionate?

I feel like Erwin is on the verge of being either, “Yes, princess, let me hold you.” or, “Oh no, no, no, we can’t be having that. Oh no, no, no. No passing illnesses, sweetie.” If the second were true, the only way to get him off your back would be by threatening to hug him while snot was dripping down your nose. This grown ass man would probably be screaming like a (very deep-voiced) little girl and running for dear life.

𝕵𝖊𝖆𝖓 𝕶𝖎𝖗𝖘𝖈𝖍𝖙𝖊𝖎𝖓 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

Jean would be so FREAKING sweet, and nobody can tell me otherwise. He’d say something like, “Awe, baby. Are you okay? Want anything?” He genuinely cares; although, immediately afterward he did anything nice or caring for you, he’d text all his dude friends and be like “yo man I’m SUCH a good boyfriend.” and brag his a*s off.

How does he comfort you?

He’d ask every once in a while if you needed anything, and he’d randomly bring you stuff like soup or a fresh cup of water. He’d probably feed you it, too.

Depending on what you wanted, Jean would either leave you alone or smother you to death. If you wanted him to leave you alone he’d check in on you every so often, and if you wanted him to smother you, he’d literally follow you all around the house. I’m talking like, cuddling or napping on the couch/bed, or straight up just following you around like an overly-attached child. His arms would be around your waist, chin on your head, and he’d waddle behind you like a d*mn penguin. And that includes trips to the bathroom. He’d probably sit outside the bathroom and wait for you, though.

Would they take/call off work for you?

If you wanted him to, were really sick, or if you were incredibly pitiful and acting like you were on your deathbed. Otherwise, I think he’d still go to work. He would bring home snacks and flowers afterwards though.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Oh my god, Jean would still be all over you. Like, there wouldn’t be a moment you’d be free from his hold. He’d probably still want to have sex with you, too as long as you were feeling well enough for it...The only exception would be if you got too over-heated or over-whelmed, then he’d very sadly hold back. Like a scolded pup, he’d just sit there...watching you...wishing you were in his arms.

𝕷𝖊𝖛𝖎 𝕬𝖈𝖐𝖊𝖗𝖒𝖆𝖓 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

You would tell him you’re not feeling well, and the first thing this man’d say would be, “What is it? You have the sh*ts? Something not coming out?” He’d get you what you needed immediately after you told him what was really wrong, though; but he’d also, very discreetly slip you a box of anti-diarrheals, too, just in case.

How does he comfort you?

Every once in a while he will ask if you need something. He’s not too over-bearing nor distant. Although, he’s probably constantly slipping you hand-sanitzers, and cleaning your room, or anything you’ve touched. It’s for your, and his sake. Oh, and he’s not handing you anything, either; he’s throwing it at you to catch. Or slipping his hand through the door with a bowl of soup/cup of water, and placing it on the floor/nearest surface. Kind of like when a cat pushes their paw through a crack, then disappears, and you’re like, “oh, would you look at that.”

I don’t think Levi would really want to be too close since he’s kind of a clean-freak, so he’d comfort you through, maybe, sending you low-quality cat memes he found on the web. Or he’d put on one of those full-on, ugly, yellow hazard suits and hold your hand while watching a reality-TV show like The Bachelorette meanwhile mocking them to oblivion. You’re legally required to laugh at the comments he makes about the people on the show; he’s doing it to be funny. He’s just awkward.

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

If you were pitiful, or not that sick, no. If you were genuinely pretty sick, then he’d call off work. He wouldn’t bug you, he’d just...stand in the corner and watch you. Just...he’d be there. Also still in his hazard suit. With his arms crossed.

Are they still physically affectionate?

No. Absolutely not. Not unless you’re talking about him and the cleaning supplies. I think if you tried to go anywhere near him, he’d get really mad and threaten you with a spray-bottle filled with water.

I think he would be upset, though. Like, I could see him having a calendar and just...sadly, squeakily dragging that marker down to form an X over the day to see how long you were sick, waiting ‘till you were better so he could hug you again.

𝕹𝖎𝖈𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖔 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

In a worried, but also kind of loving-scolding way, he’d say something like, “Geez, how’d this happen?” Immediately after he’d make you some homemade soup with fresh ingredients. Only after he would give you your medicine, because it needs a, “full stomach to work.”

Additionally, if he makes you food, don’t tell him if you can’t taste it. Please, god, don’t. He’ll feel like he did all that work for nothing then get annoyed.

How does he comfort you?

Constantly bringing you food or desserts. When he asks if you need anything, his mind jumps to a food or drink instead of medicine or a wet towel, because that’s just his strong-suit.

I feel like he would hang out with you and let you lay your head on his chest while you watched TV together. I picture him saying something like, “Hey babe, let’s watch Hell’s Kitchen.” Or, alternatively, “Hey babe, let’s watch Kitchen Nightmares.” Don’t watch Kitchen Nightmares with him. Those unclean kitchens will make HIM vomit, too.

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

Niccolo probably wouldn’t call off, but he would make you a whole bunch of yummy meals for you to eat the next day. He’d probably leave you a cute little note too, like a “Feel better, love you! :-D” with hearts all over it.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Depends on what kind of sickness you had. I think if you lost your taste he’d draw the line, simply because he needs to be able to taste the food he makes. Also, it frustrates the sh*t out of him when he loses his taste. Otherwise, I think he’d be down to cuddle, and very limitedly, kiss.

𝕽𝖊𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖗 𝕭𝖗𝖆𝖚𝖓 ~

After telling him you’re sick...

Gets VERY concerned. Wants to take you to the doctor, even if it’s a light illness, because he wants to make sure it’s nothing bad. He wouldn’t leave you alone after you tell him you’re sick, either. Constantly by your side.

How does he comfort you?

You wouldn’t need to ask for anything, because he already has everything for you. You’re surrounded in snacks, bottles of water, blankets, pillows, wet towels, medicine, literally anything you need, it’s already there. He’ll even offer to carry you to the bathroom, just so you don’t have to move.

Reiner would probably cuddle with you and put on a romance, family, or Disney movie. If it’s extra emotional, it’s gonna make him extra emotional. He will be squeezing you for dear life and just saying stuff like, “Boy, I don’t know what I’d do without you...”

Would they take/call off work to take care of you?

Yes, even if all you had was the sniffles, Reiner would have already called off, and make you call off too. He just thinks that’s what you should do if a loved one is sick. If he left you alone, he’d get worried you’d end up falling or unable to get something you need. He wants to be there for you.

Are they still physically affectionate?

Reiner would, but in a much more sweet way. He’s genuinely really worried for you, and doesn’t like seeing you sick. So be prepared for him to constantly be holding you with your head on his chest, and him peppering kisses all over your face.

[hey-hamlet]

Can we hear more about some of your SVSSS AUs? I’m particularly curious about how the linked souls/dreams one would play out, but they’re all intriguing!

YOU ARE MY FAVOURITE PERSON I LOVE YOU

AHeM-

YES YOU MAY

OK SO! Linked Souls! Sickly!Shen Yuan because im projecting a little bit, hes also around 4 years younger than Shen Jiu. When Shen Jiu turns four years old, he starts having hazy dreams of a soft, warm bed, a full stomach, but constant fevers and aches. He feels bitter - not even his dreams let him really enjoy anything. Its quiet and mostly formless until Shen Yuan learns to talk - they gain the ability to talk to eachother, like riding passenger in a car, able to talk and watch but not interact. Shen Jiu learns to read better than any of the other slaves, and teaches Yue Qi everything he learns.

 He tells Yue Qi about Shen Yuan, and Yue Qi believes him because he’d always believe his Xiao Jiu. Shen Yuan likes his Qi-ge a lot, and likes him even more when he sneaks Shen Jiu sweets ‘for a-yuan to taste’

When Shen Jiu turns 11, he’s taken by the Qius. He feels scared and guilty, because Shen Yuan will feel this too, no matter that the little brat didn’t deserve it. He was still too soft and naive, this might break him. He begs Shen Yuan to find a way to leave, but he refuses to leave his ‘big brother’ all alone.

3 years pass, Yue Qi never comes back. Shen Yuan gets sicker and sicker, and Shen Jiu fears that one of them will die before the year’s end - either from sickness or Qiu Jianluo. Qiu Jianluo tries to touch Shen Jiu one night and he snaps, killing the man and everyone in his way on the path out. He might have grit his teeth and borne it if he was alone, but he’s not letting Shen Yuan get hurt like that.  

Shen Jiu doesn’t go with Wu Yanzi after Shen Yuan begs him not to - the man is scum, and while Shen Jiu might be scum himself, Shen Yuan is soft and sweet, he doesn’t deserve to see a man so vile. Cultivating from manuals he steals from people who are likely scammers, he ends up at the immortal alliance conferance. Shen Yuan convinces him to enter - hes too tricky to get himself killed by any of the monsters, and placing anywhere better than the last dregs will be impressive for a 15 year old rouge cultivator.

Wu Yanzi is back! And hes trying to murder Yue Qi, who caught sight of Shen Jiu and froze like a deer in the headlights. Shen Jiu runs him through with a sword he stole from some asshole a few months back and then cries all over Yue Qi’s robes, and then has a very repressed panic attack about getting blood and tears on robes that cost more than his life. 

Yue Qi is also crying! Shen Yuan has no control over Shen Jiu’s eyes but by the way he’s babbling he’s probably also crying! Everyone is crying! 

Yue Qi brings Shen Jiu before his master a bit like a cat presenting a dead bird and Shen Jiu wants to die in a hole a little bit because he’s scruffy and bloody and everyone around him look like peerless immortals. He covers this up by acting as much like a pampered young lord as humanly possible. Shen Yuan is cheering him on internally. 

Shen Jiu is snapped up the the Qing Jing peak master because he’s obnoxiously intelligent and knows a truely frightening amount of characters and some really impressive maths, esspecially considering his lack of formal education (Shen Yuan, internally “Yes Jiu-ge I know, I’m amazing and the light of your life and you’re so grateful to watch my miserable homeschooling lessons”)

Yue Qi explains nothing about why he didn’t come back because! Thats just what the man is like. Shen Jiu is less furious about it and more depressed because having a perminant Shen Yuan in your head helps you develop slightly less violent coping mechanisms. Plus, Shen Yuan can’t hold a grudge to save his life and Shen Jiu uses the fact Shen Yuan missed him as a reason to visit. 

Yue Qi sticks his foot in his mouth a little less. 

Liu Qingge hates Shen Jiu On Sight as usual, and is still convinced hes a murderous little noble snake. Shen Yuan is furious, and Shen Jiu has to fight the urge to laugh at the creative streams of insults he gets running. 

Shen Yuan gets well enough to attend high school in person. He doesn’t really make any friends, but hes not lonely considering the other Shen who, while not there constantly, is basically always there by the time his first lessons start. The running commentry makes it less dull anyway. 

He graduates, applies to university. Shen Jiu becomes head disiple. Shen Yuan finishes his first year of a teaching degree before his illness relapses hard. He gets through another year of part time study before he dies. 

Something in Shen Jiu, now Shen Qingqiu, Peak Lord of Qing Jing, dies with him. His students liken him to a ghost, dressed in mourning white, rising late and sleeping early, but often seen wandering the peak in the dead of night. Yue Qingyuan visits often, but Shen Qingqiu says nothing. 

Liu Qingge, angry at what he assumes is a fit of drama crashes onto the peak in a self rightious rage, challenging Shen Qingqiu to a duel. Thats the only time he ever loses a duel to him. The Yue Qingyuan has to pull them apart, Shen Qingqiu still snarling with rage. 

The news that he deviates that night shocks no one. Yue Qingyuan is frigid with Liu Qingge, and it unnerves the other peak lords. 

Shen Qingqiu has barely recovered from one of the worst Qi deviations he’s ever had when a disiple all but crashes through his door, scared shitless of the half dead looking man who stumbled through the peak’s barriers like so much air. 

Shen Qingqiu doesnt dare hope - Shen Yuan is dead, and a world away at that - but wouldn’t his soul be allowed to pass through the barrier? Shen Qingqiu had never had a problem when they shared bodies.

The man (barely a man, he would be 21 if he hadn’t been dead for 3 months) looks truly awful, feverish and flushed, but Shen Qingqiu know’s that face better than he know’s his own. 

“A-Yuan?”